Chapter 1129: This World Means Nothing to Me!
Gazing at Gu Qingcheng, who went away and returned, Yun Liuli, who was slumped on the desk writing something, turned around, still holding a pen.
“Drinking milk will help you get to sleep!” Gu Qingcheng said, taking the milk over to her.
Yun Liuli stared at Gu Qingcheng, looking dazed, until he walked to face her…
Gu Qingcheng bent over and set down the milk. In his vision was Yun Liuli’s slender fingers holding a pen. She seemed to have only written two lines on the clean and pretty piece of paper. As her slim hands and pen were blocking his view, Gu Qingcheng could only see the opening of the letter, seeing to whom it was addressed.
Yun Liuli was writing a letter to her deceased mother.
She smiled at Gu Qingcheng. “Thanks, Uncle Qingcheng.”
Seeing that the young lady’s eyes were red, Gu Qingcheng said, “If you really can’t sleep alone, then come to Uncle Qingcheng’s room to sleep.”
Yun Liuli shook her head. “Apologies, Uncle Qingcheng, previously it was insensible of me. I now understand what Uncle Qingcheng said to me. Girls can only sleep in the same bed as their husbands. Uncle Qingcheng is my elder!”
Being rebutted with his own words, Gu Qingcheng pursed his lips and nodded. “Sleep early then! Else your wounds won’t recover well…”
“It’s okay, no one will care anyway!” Yun Liuli’s clean voice sounded low. “From the time I was injured, I haven’t received a single call from my dad! Even my biological father doesn’t care, so who else would care…”
Gu Qingcheng had a bitter sensation in his mouth, but he wasn’t able to tell Yun Liuli that her father was no longer around.
“Uncle Qingcheng, I wish to return to the hospital to stay tomorrow.” Yun Liuli gazed at Gu Qingcheng. “I’ve given Uncle Qingcheng trouble! It’s been tough on Uncle Qingcheng!”
“Just stay at home!” Gu Qingcheng frowned. “It’s pretty troublesome going through all that hassle!”
The young lady thought for a moment, then obediently agreed. “Okay, then I’ll leave right after I’ve recovered from my injuries. I’ll have to trouble Uncle Qingcheng for some time more. I’m so sorry.”
He was vexed from hearing Yun Liuli address him as Uncle Qingcheng!
He clearly knew that he shouldn’t stay there any further, but he… was unable to leave and let the young lady stay there all by herself.
“What are you writing?” Gu Qingcheng tried starting a conversation with Yun Liuli.
“I’m writing a letter to my mother,” Yun Liuli explained to Gu Qingcheng. “It’s my birth mother. She has already passed away…”
Gu Qingcheng nodded. After that, it seemed like there wasn’t anything else he could say to Yun Liuli. He asked, “What have you written?”
Yun Liuli didn’t seem to mind his asking. She shifted her arm and took a glance, inconcealable sadness and sorrow in her eyes. “I want to ask Mom… if I go and look for her, would I not be so lonely anymore? Would she accompany me forever?”
Gu Qingcheng’s heart skipped a beat, feeling as if someone had just stabbed him with a knife.
“What thinking is this?” Gu Qingcheng was angry, and hence his tone was inevitably higher.
Yun Liuli gazed into Gu Qingcheng’s eyes calmly. “A thought I’ve had for a long time…”
Gu Qingcheng grabbed Yun Liuli’s wrist, almost pulling her up from her chair. His vision swept over the letter. On it was written…
[I want to look for Mom. I’m not sure if Mom will be happy to see me. Will she keep me company forever? Because Liuli is so scared of being alone.]
Gu Qingcheng held Yun Liuli’s wrist in a death grip, almost like he was trying to snap her wrist.
“Dispel this thought!” Gu Qingcheng’s heart was beating very fast. He felt a greater lingering fear than if he had just escaped death himself.
Gu Qingcheng’s voice, as well as his fingers, were trembling.
He never knew that Yun Liuli had thoughts of killing herself.
A suffocating terror seized Gu Qingcheng’s entire body. He pulled Yun Liuli to face him, his throat vibrating greatly. It was as if there was a large hand grabbing him by the throat, making him unable to say a single word.
“Uncle Qingcheng… you are merely a friend of my dad. I’m thankful to you for taking care of me, but why should Uncle Qingcheng interfere with what I write or what I think?”
Gu Qingcheng clenched his teeth, a rage culminating in his deep and dark eyes.
“We haven’t known each other for long. What I think and do… so long as it doesn’t affect you… I think…”
“Have you thought of your dad when you think of killing yourself? Are you not letting your dad down?” Gu Qingcheng clenched his teeth hard.
“If my dad truly cares, why don’t you call him and get him to scold me himself?” Contrasting Gu Qingcheng’s expression, Yun Liuli looked calm and serious, as if there was no longer anything in the world that was worth caring about.
Her gaze was so hollow it made one panic.
Yun Liuli’s lips curled, smiling at Gu Qingcheng. “No one cares about me, no one ever does! This world is too lonely. I go to school alone, I return home alone, I eat alone, and I sleep alone. It’s really too lonely. Dad often tells me that when Mom was around, in order to spend more time with me, she quit her job to stay at home and take care of me. Hence, I think… perhaps only Mom loves and dotes on me the most and can’t bear to see me lonely the most. That’s why I want to look for Mom! I even… can’t wait to do so.”
“Yun Liuli!” There seemed to be a crack in Gu Qingcheng’s usually calm facial features. He said, “I forbid it!”
Yun Liuli only smiled and said nothing.
Gu Qingcheng’s head throbbed painfully.
He couldn’t possibly watch over Yun Liuli 24/7. If Yun Liuli made up her mind to do something, who could stop her?
“Uncle Qingcheng, I said my memory is coming back bit by bit. Aren’t you scared?” Yun Liuli asked. “Now… the memories are coming back bit by bit, including… my feelings for you!”
Gu Qingcheng’s eyes were so dark it was frightening.
Yun Liuli’s eyes were red and watery. “Uncle Qingcheng… you should be glad that I’m staying far away from you. After I recalled those feelings for you that I found hard to say out loud… I also wanted to stay away from you. Isn’t the furthest distance in this world… life and death!”
“Shut your mouth! Do you hear me!” Gu Qingcheng howled.
So, Yun Liuli had been staying up because she recalled it all?
“Who are you forcing with your death?” Gu Qingcheng clenched his teeth.
Holding back the painful sensation in her wrist, Yun Liuli shook her head, tears welling up in her eyes. “Mom’s gone, Dad’s gone, Stepmom’s gone. In this world… I’m all by myself. Who else can I force? I only hope that in the other world… Dad won’t be so busy anymore, and Mom will constantly stay by my side. In that world, happiness is waiting for me!”
“Uncle Qingcheng, if it weren’t for you, I might have ended my life when Dad passed away, for this world means nothing to me! Only never-ending loneliness! It’s too hard to endure!” Yun Liuli’s tears slipped down her eyelashes. “When I think of how I have 40… 50 years, or even 60 or 70 years ahead of me… I’m scared!”