Cultivation Chat Group Chapter 836 - This is so frigging embarrassing

Chapter 836: This is so frigging embarrassing

Translator: GodBrandy Editor: Kurisu
Impossible! This was reality, and not a video game where one could simply use money to buy pay-to-win items and quickly level up. This was the world of cultivation… how could it be so easy to advance in realm?
“Now then, where were you three planning to go before bumping into me?” Song Shuhang, who was in front of them, asked at this time.
Guoguo coughed, and then said, “Senior Brother Shuhang, can we not reply to this question?”
“Hehe, if you want me to spank you until you shiet all over the place… sure.” Song Shuhang tilted his head and gently smiled. “Guoguo, I need to remind you of something. I’m now at the Third Stage Overcast Moon Meridian Realm. Therefore, you can forget about escaping!”
The small monk opened his eyes wide. Song Shuhang had really reached the Third Stage Realm! This was like cheating!
But right at this time, the slightly older girl pondered for a moment, and said, “Senior Brother Shuhang, we were originally planning to head to the Jiangnan area.”
She believed that it would be somewhat difficult to vanquish demons and monsters by relying solely on the strength of the trio. Therefore, if they could travel alongside this Senior Brother Song, who was already at the Third Stage Realm, their chances of success would be much higher.
But here came the problem… how could they convince this Senior Brother Shuhang to go with them, making him vanquish demons and monsters together with them?
No, wait… the main problem was that this Senior Brother Shuhang had just received a mission from Senior Brother Three Realms, and the mission consisted in sending the three of them back!
“Eh? You were also headed to the Jiangnan area?” Song Shuhang pulled his suitcase along and stretched out his hand to push his sunglasses up. After pondering for a moment, he said, “In that case, since Senior Brother Three Realms has yet to come over to pick you up, you’ll follow me to Wenzhou City. If Senior Brother Three Realms hasn’t come by tomorrow, I’ll bring you to the Jiangnan area. I was just planning to go there since my university is about to start.”
After hearing these words, the eyes of the small monk Guoguo immediately lit up. “Senior Brother Shuhang, as expected, you are the best!”
Song Shuhang used a karate chop to gently hit the head of the small monk, and then said, “It’s too late for your flattery. Right, let me introduce myself. My surname is Song, and my name is Shuhang. As for my daoist name… forget it, just call me Tyrannical Saber Song One, alright?”
Song Shuhang was too lazy to mention all his daoist names. Recently, the name ‘Tyrannical Saber Song One’ was rather trendy, and even the White Cloud Academy referred to him with this name in public.
Therefore, since he was too lazy to tell them about all his daoist names, he decided to just use ‘Tyrannical Saber Song One’.
Sometimes, getting used to things could have scary effects. For example, now that Song Shuhang was used to the daoist name ‘Tyrannical Saber Song One’, he didn’t feel embarrassed or awkward when people called him by this name.
For another example, Song Shuhang had now gotten used to using the saber, and he even felt that riding a flying saber might be very cool.
“Hello, Senior Brother Tyrannical Saber,” the slightly older girl said in a soft voice. “My name is Shi, and I don’t have a daoist name yet.”
“My name is Zhu,” the slightly younger girl replied cautiously.
“Well… you can just call me Senior Brother Shuhang, alright?” Song Shuhang got somewhat curious, and asked,” Anyway, you have a single-character name?”
They didn’t have a surname? Just like Venerable ‘White’?
“Yes, we have a single-character name. It’s the tradition of our sect,” Loli Shi replied in a soft voice.
“Although a single-character name sounds somewhat strange, I’m still very happy that I ended up with it. If our sect had the tradition of giving the disciples two-character names… my teacher would have surely called me Lazhu (wax candle). Therefore, I’m happy with just the single-character name ‘Zhu’—it sounds more pleasant,” Loli Zhu replied with a serious expression on her face.
“What a strange tradition… however, you don’t have it that bad in the end. According to what I know, there is this very peculiar sect that decided to name its disciples after all sorts of flora. The daoist names of the previous generation were of the vegetable series, and the ones of the current generation are of the fruit series. Perhaps the daoist names of the next generation would be named after cereals?” Song Shuhang smiled and tried to comfort them.
“…” Loli Shi.
“…” Loli Zhu.
There is somewhat wrong with this atmosphere! I was trying to comfort them, but it seems it had the opposite effect…? Song Shuhang immediately had a bad premonition.
The small monk Guoguo quietly pulled the corner of Song Shuhang’s clothes, and said, “Senior Brother Shuhang, the sect you are talking about is precisely the sect Shi and Zhu come from. If seniority is taken into account, they should be Fairy Lychee’s juniors. In other words, they are part of the ‘cereal generation’ you mentioned just now.”
“…” Song Shuhang.
Well, this is so frigging embarrassing!
Loli Shi said, “Are you saying that our daoist names will be of the cereal series? Like Fairy Wheat or Fairy Paddy Rice?”
Loli Zhu said anxiously, “No, I don’t want a similar name! I might as well choose the name Fairy Wax Candle at this point!”
“Cough.” Guoguo coughed, and comforted them, “Still, Shi and Zhu aren’t really part of Fairy Lychee’s lineage. The vegetable and fruit series daoist names are limited to Fairy Lychee’s lineage. As far as I know, Shi and Zhu’s lineage doesn’t have these types of daoist names.”
“You actually know so many things?” Song Shuhang was surprised.
“Ahaha, I just heard Senior Brother Three Realms mention this stuff.” The small monk rubbed his bald head. He absolutely wasn’t going to tell Song Shuhang that he had asked Senior Brother Three Realms about all this information so that he could abduct these two honored guests.
Although the small monk was very disobedient, he would act only after careful planning whenever he was going to do something. For example, when he’d run away from the temple the first time to treat his hemorrhoids, he came up all alone with the idea of selling himself to a slave trader so that he could scrape together the money necessary for the surgery.
But right at this time, the slightly older girl, ‘Shi’, said, “Senior Brother Shuhang, are we going to take another train and head to Wenzhou City? I’m asking because we don’t have any money with us at the moment… we used everything we had to buy the tickets for that train headed to the Jiangnan area.”
“…” Song Shuhang gazed at the small monk, and said, “Were you planning to head to the Jiangnan area with no money at all? If you guys hadn’t bumped into me, where were you going to sleep after reaching the Jiangnan area? And what about your food?”
“Of course, we were going to live in the place Senior Medicine Master bought! I even have the key,” the small monk Guoguo said smugly.
“When did you get the key?” Song Shuhang was stunned.
“Doudou gave it to me,” the small monk replied honestly. “Doudou gave one to Senior White, one to me, and also had his own copy of the key.”
Song Shuhang sighed. As expected, it was Doudou’s doing. “Still, what about your food?”
“There is a lot of food stored in Senior Medicine Master’s multi-storied building. Although I don’t know how to cook, Shi can do it,” Guoguo said smugly.
Loli Shi blushed, somewhat embarrassed.
Shuhang hadn’t expected that this little miss could even cook!
When disobedient children team up together, they sure can do scary things, Song Shuhang thought to himself.
“Such being the case, Senior Shuhang, you will have to pay for our train tickets if you want to bring us to Wenzhou City,” the small monk said, self-satisfied.
Song Shuhang said, “Forget it, we aren’t taking the train anymore.”
“In that case, how are we going to Wenzhou City?” the small monk asked.
Song Shuhang replied, “Follow me for now. Let’s get out of the train station first.”
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Song Shuhang brought Guoguo and the others outside the train station and looked for a place with no people.
“Wait a moment… Senior Brother Shuhang, is it possible that you are also short of money? Are we going to run until Wenzhou City in that case?” the small monk asked cautiously.
After hearing Guoguo’s words, the complexions of Loli Zhu and Loli Shi immediately paled. Running until Wenzhou City? Even if they used magical techniques, they would have to run for more than ten hours!
“Good idea,” Song Shuhang said with a smile. “Unfortunately, I’m in a hurry now, and we will have to leave this method for another time. Alright, Ye Si~ come out and meet the children.”
Ye Si drilled out of Song Shuhang’s chest, and said, “Oh! Hello, little fellow daoists. I’m Ye Si from the Crystal-Clear Water Pavilion, and you can just call me Senior Sister Ye Si.”
When they suddenly saw a person drill out of Song Shuhang’s chest, Guoguo, Shi, and Zhu got a scare.
After a short moment, the small monk asked in puzzlement, “Senior Sister Ye Si, why are you inside Senior Brother Shuhang’s body?”
“Because I’m his ghost spirit!” Ye Si replied.
The small monk raised his head and looked at Song Shuhang. “Senior Brother Shuhang, you actually turned your ghost spirit into a girl!”
“Don’t let your thoughts wander!” Song Shuhang used a karate chop to hit the bald head of the small monk. “Senior Sister Ye Si isn’t my previous ghost spirit. This matter is a long story. If you are curious, I can slowly tell you about it later. A lot of things happened during this month. Ye Si, let’s fly to Wenzhou City!”
“Sure, but wait a moment. I want to activate the navigator first since I have no idea where Wenzhou City is,” Ye Si said.
“…” Song Shuhang.
After a short moment, Senior Sister Ye Si operated her flight-type magical treasure, which happened to be a golden book, and soared into the sky while bringing along Song Shuhang, Guoguo, Shi, and Zhu.
When the golden book soared into the sky, an invisible formation activated, making Song Shuhang and the others invisible to the eyes of ordinary people.
Song Shuhang hoped that the navigator was trustworthy. He didn’t want to end up in the wrong place.
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In the Netherworld Realm, inside the world of the black lotus.
Senior White Two had spent several days researching the place, and he had managed to thoroughly comprehend its properties by now.
Previously, he had seen the ball of liquid metal leave its mark of ownership inside the world of the black lotus through a special dance.
Now, as long as Senior White Two followed the inverse method, it wouldn’t be a problem for him to crack the secret behind the mark of ownership of the world of the black lotus.
“Just give me the time to carry out a few experiments, and I’ll be able to erase the mark that that idiot left in the world of the black lotus. After that, I’ll leave behind a new mark and become the new master of this world… it sounds very exciting!” Senior White Two said happily.
After I’m finished turning the world of the black lotus into my private property, I’ll leisurely spin a cocoon here and have a good sleep.
This time, I’ll hopefully be able to sleep longer than usual, possibly over a thousand years.
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In the meantime, in Fairy Lychee’s immortal cave.
Fairy Lychee rested her chin in her hand and lazily looked at herself in the mirror.
The movie that the Nine Provinces Number One Group had produced would be screened today. However, Fairy Lychee wasn’t planning to sneak into a movie theater and watch it.
Actually, since after the 20th of this month, she had become somewhat restless and was unable to calm down.
Should I look for a place to relax? But where can I go? Fairy Lychee thought to herself.
Right, didn’t Venerable White say that he would bring her, Shuhang, Yu Jiaojiao, and the others to the ancient ruins of that ‘Immortal’ to have some fun?
But when would Venerable White be free?