Cultivation Chat Group Chapter 729 - That smile is too ugly, change it into something else!

Chapter 729: That smile is too ugly, change it into something else!

Translator: GodBrandy Editor: Kurisu
The original idea of that master blacksmith was to create a pair of shoes with something like the ‘sword riding feature’, which would allow it to work as ‘flying shoes’. However, they ultimately failed, and obtained a super weakened version of those ‘flying shoes’, which were then transformed into ‘face slapping shoes’.
Actually, there were many cultivators that had carried out similar experiments. A lot of cultivators dreamt of flying before reaching the Fourth Stage Realm. For example, Great Master Profound Principle had created a half-finished ‘sword controlling technique’, and Medicine Master that ‘artificial insect’ that could allow one to turn into a hot air balloon.
After hearing the explanation, Song Shuhang felt that this Face Slapping Flip-flop was rather interesting. “Shopkeeper, how much is it for this face slapping flip-flop?”
“Fellow Daoist, if you like this item, I can sell it to you at the market price. The market price is five spirit stones of the Third Stage,” the shopkeeper said with a bright smile.
It was actually more expensive than that pair of shoes with the floating feature that Sixteen bought earlier?
However, it was still within the range Song Shuhang could accept. “Sure, I will buy it.”
The shopkeeper quickly wrapped up the flip-flop for Song Shuhang. In the wrapped-up package was unexpectedly a pair of flip-flops. However, the left one was just a normal flip-flop, only more durable than an ordinary one. The real ‘Face Slapping Flip-flop’ was the right one.
Song Shuhang and Sixteen left the shop, very satisfied.
Outside the shop, Song Shuhang looked all around.
Su Clan’s Sixteen asked, “What are you looking for?”
“I’m looking for that Fellow Daoist Su Wenqu that threw us to the ground earlier,” Song Shuhang said with a gentle smile. The change of attitude of that female shopkeeper was too obvious.
Since Song Shuhang and Su Clan’s Sixteen hadn’t brought Venerable White with them, it was rather obvious that someone had said something to the shopkeeper via secret sound transmission, causing her sudden change in attitude.
Since Fellow Daoist Su Wenqu was ultimately True Monarch Eternal Fire’s son, it was very likely that he was the one that had secretly said something to the shopkeeper.
Su Clan’s Sixteen likewise smiled and nodded. She was now clear as to what had happened.
But, even after searching for a while, Song Shuhang didn’t find any trace of the ‘Saber Wielding Scholar’.
“Forget it. Let’s keep strolling around the streets,” Song Shuhang said.
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Around an hour later.
Song Shuhang and Su Clan’s Sixteen finished visiting all the shops they wanted to visit, and returned with a full load.
At this time, the duo was sitting on a bench in the public square, taking a break.
In the center of the public square, the thirteen statues of the Tribulation Transcenders disciples of the Sage were standing high. As soon as he saw the statues, Song Shuhang felt the trauma in his heart resurface.
Su Clan’s Sixteen stretched herself, and said, “The break should be about to end, right? Shall we head toward the filming location in that case?”
“Yeah, it should be about time. I’ll contact Fairy Lychee and Senior White and ask them if they want to head back,” Song Shuhang replied.
As such, he took out his mobile phone and prepared to give Venerable White a call. Hopefully, Senior White was already done with that ‘rental flying sword’ thing.
After taking out his phone, he swiped on the screen to unlock it. But, right at that time, he saw in the corner of his eye that the ‘thirteen statues’ emitted a faint scarlet radiance.
The corner of Song Shuhang’s mouth twitched. Then, a bad feeling welled up in his heart.
All those that had read the novel ‘Terror Infinity’ knew that the main character would be able to return to his daily life after completing his various missions. Then, when the next mission started, he would be dragged to the infinite dimension once more.
I’m not going to get dragged away to take another test, right? Song Shuhang thought to himself.
If he was really being dragged away to take another make-up test, he would go insane! After all, only one hour had passed since he had taken that test that required him to write down from memory the ❮Self-Cultivating Prose Poetry of the Sage❯!
As such, it shouldn’t happen again so quickly, right?
Just as this thought flashed through his mind, everything before his eyes went black.
Shiet, it’s happening again!
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Song Shuhang’s body leaned to one side and fell toward Su Clan’s Sixteen. As for his consciousness, it was dragged to a huge, black public square.
In the public square, the statue of Daozi, the head disciple of the thirteen Tribulation Transcenders under the command of the Sage, was emitting a weak radiance.
What kind of test was it going to be this time?
Song Shuhang turned his head and looked all around. In the next moment, he felt a dull pain transmitting from his liver. This time, he was the only person dragged to this place.
Su Wenqu and the other seven scholarly disciples hadn’t been dragged to this public square!
If he had to take a test this time too, he was a goner.
“Oh! Little friend Shuhang, we meet again.” Right at this time, a familiar voice was transmitted over from the sky.
Song Shuhang turned his head around, and discovered that Senior White Two was hovering above his head, yawning. At this time, the clothes he was wearing had directly turned into a ‘sleeping bag’, and his whole body was tucked inside it, with only his eyes and nose visible.
After seeing Senior White Two, a happy expression flashed through Song Shuhang’s eyes. “Senior White, you are also here!” That was simply great. If a cheat-like existence such as Senior White Two was here, he wasn’t afraid of any test.
“Actually, I’ve been here all along,” Senior White Two said. “At a certain point, I fell asleep, and then woke up after sleeping very soundly. However, I got pretty bored afterward, and decided to use the connection between you and the statues to bring you here so that you could accompany me for a while.”
“…” Song Shuhang.
That happy feeling from before immediately turned into desperation… it turned out that the reason he was here in the first place was Senior White Two!
Song Shuhang forced a smile, and said, “Senior White, did you need something from me since you brought me here?”
“Hmm, I remember that there was something I wanted to tell you. It was something very important, but since I slept so well earlier, I forgot about it,” Senior White Two said with a confused expression on his face.
“…” Song Shuhang.
“Don’t look at me like that. You have to know that I’m very old and have lived for a long time… it’s normal for old people to forget things when their age is too advanced.” Senior White Two tried to defend himself.
Song Shuhang forced a smile, and said, “In that case, how can I make you remember about that very important matter, Senior White?” The best course of action was to satisfy Senior White Two and leave this place as soon as possible. Therefore, he decided to go along with Senior White Two’s demands.
Senior White Two held his chin, and said, “I’m really unable to recall it… such being the case, how about telling me a joke? Perhaps I’ll be able to recall it if I’m happy enough?”
“…” Song Shuhang.
Senior White Two said, “What, you don’t want to tell a joke?”
Song Shuhang clenched his teeth, and said, “I will, I will. Just let me think a bit!”
“Good. I’ll wait then.” Senior White Two changed his posture inside the sleeping bag to a more comfortable one.
Song Shuhang thought for a while, and his eyes finally lit up. “I remembered about an interesting online meme [Girl, can you smile at me? If you don’t want to, do you want me to smile at you? Hehehe?] Ahaha~”
Senior White Two opened his eyes wide.
“How was that? It was funny, right?” Song Shuhang said.
Senior White Two earnestly nodded his head, and said, “Yeah, not bad. It was truly an excellent joke. I remembered a little bit about that matter… this important matter I wanted to tell you is directly related to your safety, as well as to your life and death, but since I was deeply shocked by this joke just now, I’m unable to recall the exact content of that matter I wanted to tell you. In that case, are you prepared to die, little friend Song Shuhang?”
“Ah?” Song Shuhang opened his eyes wide. “It’s something directly related to my safety?”
“Yes. It’s not something related only to your safety. It’s something that concerns the life and death of the people close to you too,” Senior White Two said earnestly.
“Senior White, I made a mistake! I shouldn’t have told you that crappy joke earlier! What if I tell you another joke?” Song Shuhang quickly tried to save the situation.
“Too late,” Senior White Two said.
“Senior White, it is said that one shouldn’t commit the same mistake more than thrice! Therefore, you should give me another two chances!” Song Shuhang said.
He felt that Senior White Two wasn’t joking earlier, and that there was really something related to his safety that he wanted to tell him.
“Not repeating the same mistake more than thrice? It makes sense.” Senior White Two stretched his hand out of the sleeping bag and held his chin. “Good, I’ll give you another opportunity, then. Didn’t you just say you wanted to smile at me? In that case, smile at me. As long as I find your smiling face satisfying enough, I might remember about that matter.”
“…” Song Shuhang.
“What, you don’t want to smile, either?” Senior White Two asked.
Song Shuhang squeezed out a smile.
“Ugly. Your face is too stiff. Change it into a devilish smile,” Senior White Two said.
The corner of Song Shuhang’s mouth twitched. Then, he squeezed out a devilish smile.
“Ugly too, now roar with laughter,” Senior White Two said again.
Song Shuhang took a deep breath. “Ahahaha.”
“The sound was too unpleasant to hear. Change it into a sinister smile,” Senior White Two continued.
Song Shuhang clenched his teeth and tried his best to make a sinister smile appear on his face.
Senior White Two patted his chest, and said, “Now, that was scary. This sinister smile was truly frightening. Now, change it into a heartwarming smile.”
Song Shuhang rubbed his face and revealed a warm smile.
“Hmm, this smiling face isn’t bad. However, it’s rather dull, and it’s not as attractive as my own smile,” Senior White Two said in disdain.
Song Shuhang was speechless. At this point, he was just getting bullied! How many people in the world could compete with Senior White when it came to good looks?!
“Now, laugh like a young girl, the ‘tee-hee’ type of laughter,” Senior White Two continued.
Song Shuhang immediately refused. “Senior White, that’s the sound made by hens 1 .”
“In that case, how about the ‘chirp, chirp’ type?” Senior White Two said.
“What kind of laughter is that!” Song Shuhang couldn’t help but ridicule.
Senior White Two raised his finger high up, and said, “Damn, you are really a party pooper… fine, the last one, show me a fiendish grin!”
Showing him a fiendish grin wasn’t a problem, because Song Shuhang just happened to be thinking of grinning fiendishly at Senior White Two. This wasn’t an act, but his true feelings showing up.
“Damn, this fiendish grin was super scary. It scared me so much that I won’t be able to sleep for three days straight,” Senior White Two said with an exaggerated expression on his face.
His voice had hardly faded that Song Shuhang’s smiling face became even more hideous.
“Stop, that’s enough. I’m completely satisfied!” Senior White Two waved his hand, and said, “Since you spared no effort with these smiles, I’ll tell you about that interesting news. Your current location is close to the Mountain of Myriad Books, right? In addition, according to the information I have, that grand ceremony that scholars hold once every three years should be about to begin, correct?”
Song Shuhang nodded.
“In that case, you’d better get ready to withstand a large-scale attack of the Netherworld Realm,” Senior White Two said with a faint smile.