Chapter 1097 Tokyo Illusion Part 35
SUMIRE
Sumire shakes her head. The more she thinks about it, the more her resolve will waver. It has only been a few hours, a few hours since Yuhi-san held her in his arms so lovingly. How did they go from that situation to the mess that happened earlier?
'It's my fault. I shouldn't have reacted so sensitively. Even if I sensed how strongly he was blocking me out. I should have just dismissed it. When he was holding me, I already knew something was wrong with him. I shouldn't have behaved the way I did.'
Even if she goes back and apologizes now, the damage has been done.
Toh sighs deeply, "Then I suppose we can stay up and chat."
Sumire blinked. "You don't have to sacrifice your sleep for me." She trailed off. "You need to get some sleep too."
Toh shakes his head. "I'd rather spend all night listening to your pretty voice beautiful."
Sumire laughed. "You really are good with compliments."
Toh ran his fingers down her arm. "My compliments are reserved for you, beautiful."
"Toh, thank you so much for taking care of not just Yuhi-san but San too. I'm sure it hasn't been easy to deal with the second one especially."
"His mood swings have gotten really bad. I thought taking him to the party would ease his mood, that's why I gave him that chance to be alone with Yuhi. But he messed it up didn't he?"
Sumire sighs. "Yuhi-san came in time but yes he did mess it up." She trails off. "I don't understand why he is behaving that way. I thought, after that time, San would be more understanding."
She thought they reached a mutual understanding. So, how on earth did it end up like this?
"Is it really hard for us to be friends?" Sumire mumbled. "I no longer want to cut him out of my life. I care about him, I won't abandon him if he gets hurt. Isn't that enough for him?"
'Why can't it be enough? It's already a miracle that I forgave him, why does he want more?'
"It's like you always say beautiful. Humans can be such selfish creatures. You're right, and he is wrong. You forgiving him and giving him all that should be enough. He has no right to ask you for anything more. But unfortunately there is only a small percentage of people who understand that logic. The vast majority are selfish creatures."
"But San is-"
Toh sighs. "You really do care about him now. Did that incident truly change everything?"
"When I saw him suffering like that, it opened my eyes. I know he hurt me. No, what he did to me wasn't a simple case of him hurting me. He broke me down not only physically but mentally. Mental scars are much harder to heal than physical ones. What San did was unforgivable. However, I think he has been punished enough. He turned himself into an evolved human just so he could have the power to protect me. He underwent so many experiments." Sumire shakes her head. "It's enough, he doesn't have to torture himself anymore. I've forgiven him."
"Your forgiveness isn't enough beautiful, he wants you to love him again."
At those words she sobbed. "I can't. I can't foster those type of feelings for him again, it's impossible. I thought I could try, there was a time where I thought if he proved himself, then I could."
"Was this during the beginning of your relationship with Terashima?"
Sumire nodded. "I was terrified that what I had with Yuhi was temporary. I thought I would be left alone again. I saw that San was trying so hard to prove his affections for me, so I thought maybe I could give him a chance."
"But?"
"While San was doing that, Yuhi-san was doing the exact same thing. Yuhi was, showing me how much he loved me and doing his very best to make me smile, to make me feel loved. I had to compare the two, and Yuhi-san won so easily. San realized I was comparing the two and increased his efforts, but Yuhi-san didn't know and still won me over."
"I understand what your trying to say, with Terashima everything came naturally. But with Nagawa, you had to say something to encourage him."
Sumire shakes her head. "I think it was hopeless no matter what he did. From the very start, I have always loved Yuhi. It never went away even when I fell in love with you and Ru. Yuhi-san will always be a part of me, and now I understand why."
Toh wasn't saying anything but she knew he understood too.
"I think Yuhi-san was my original soul bond partner." Sumire mumbled.
"Do you remember?"
Sumire shakes her head. "Not exactly, I do recall however my family being very overprotective of me. I heard them mentioning that I got into some kind of accident when I was younger. That accident is probably related to Yuhi-san."
The phoenix god Yi, everyone knew he lived in isolation due to the nature of his powers. But there was a rumor that for a few years there was a girl who was naive to climb those mountains and continued to see him. Oddly enough nobody remembers who that girl was, and there was no information written about her anywhere.
Whenever she heard that story, she would feel a tug in her chest. It didn't make sense why. She tried to search for some answers, some kind of clue. She even entertained the idea of travelling to those mountains. Sumire paused, 'I didn't just entertain the idea. I actually tried going, but at the entrance of the mountains I found my brothers there and they told me to turn back.'
Afterwards she was too busy with her studies in the university, and she found herself drawn to Lennon. So, she forgot about the tug, the pull towards the phoenix God.
How stupid and naive of her. Because now that she is thinking about it carefully, that tug was the soul bond wasn't it? It was fractured, but it was the soul bond.
'From the very start, it seems like we were truly meant to be Yuhi-san. But, I still don't remember what happened then. If I ask you about it, will you tell me? Or will you hide it from me?'
She doesn't want there to be any more secrets between them. But if Yuhi-san still isn't comfortable sharing with her, there is a limit to what she can do.