Chapter 1046 This is me Part 22
SUMIRE
"Sumire-"
Sumire shakes her head. "No matter what you say, it won't erase what I did. I want to be grand and say it will never happen again. But this war between the black alice organisation and the rest of the underworld? It will lead to more bloodshed. I have been thinking for a while now. Do the holy knights really have the right to determine who is evil and who isn't? Who is to say I haven't hurt innocent people in the name of justice before?"
During her amnesia state, no, long before then she has been having such thoughts. The Holy Knights, Hyou4 - all these established 'delinquent groups.' Why do they have the right to decide who should be punished? She met so many good people in those prison cells.
Toh exhales deeply. "After hearing all that, it's hard to lecture you further beautiful."
Sumire laughed weakly. "Maybe this is part of my plan to get out of trouble." She joked.
"I don't want to lecture you further. But, I have to say. I found that razor hidden in my clothes. Did you think if you hid it amongst my belongings, I wouldn't see it?"
"..."
"Beautiful, if you ever hurt yourself again. I'll do the same."
Sumire blinked hearing his words, before she could ask him what he meant. He suddenly removed his belt. Sumire covers her face immediately.
"What on earth are you doing stripping out of-" Sumire trailed off, her eyes widened alarmed as she caught something in the gap between her fingers.
On Toh's legs were similar scars, to the ones on her body. Sumire immediately rushed over, double checking to see if her eyes were playing tricks on her. The moment she got down on her knees to inspect Toh's wounds however, she knew it was real.
"You idiot!!" Sumire exclaimed.
"I have to, your pain is my pain."
Sumire sobbed. "Oh, you're making me cry again." Why does this man do so much for her? But thinking that is stupid. She already knows the reason why. It's because of his feelings for her.
"Crying, and having you on your knees. This is an interesting day."
Sumire's cheeks flushed realizing the current situation. Although he still had his pants on, she was painfully aware of how close her face was to his growing erection. She quickly stood up and made some space between them.
Toh chuckles. "Don't you need to inspect anymore?"
If anybody else heard what Toh was saying, they would assume he was trying to seduce her, and maybe he was. But she can't allow herself to get caught up in the flow.
"Put your pants back on!!" Sumire exclaimed
"Can't you help me with that?"
Sumire shakes her head and looks away. She heard Toh sigh and after a few minutes she was pulled into his arms, thankfully he was wearing more clothes now.
"Sorry for teasing you."
"Mm, idiot."
Toh chuckled. "Really, I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable."
"N-no it's alright." Sumire trailed off. Maybe he needs to stop hugging her. She can feel-
Toh led her back to the couch and pulled her onto his lap as he gently caressed her arm and back. A content sigh escaped her lips.
"I think you're getting better at tricking me." Sumire mumbled.
Toh chuckled mischievously down her ear and she shudders. "There is no need for tricks, but I don't need to spell out why."
Thump. Thump.
'Because you're more fond of me than you let yourself believe beautiful.'
Hearing his voice in her head, Sumire looks at him alarmed. "This is an invasion of privacy."
"I like being in your mind beautiful, you have really interesting thoughts."
"Get out of my head this instance! Or I'll stab you."
Toh blinked. "I suddenly feel very loved."
Sumire grumbled frustrated as she tried to break free from his hold, but Toh wasn't letting her go. His lips lingered on her neck before she felt him place a few gentle kisses there.
"Did you really have to come here now?" Toh mumbled.
"I had to. You know it was?for Ru-"
"Was it really? Or is it because you can't control the blood lust, that was triggered by being with Lucifer?"
Sumire flinched and Toh sighs. "You can be very obvious beautiful. Also, the Lord warned me about this."
"He did?"
Toh nodded. "He gave you two choices there, go to him and spend the night with him or go to him and spend a few hours drinking his blood."
Sumire sighs. Why do both cases include being intimate with him. She can't let that happen. She has already betrayed Yuhi too much. Memories or not, what she did with Lucifer was wrong. It will forever weigh on her heart.
"Can't you come up with a third option?" Sumire muttered.
"There is." Toh suddenly said. "But, I don't think your comfortable with the idea of drinking from me for a few hours. During that time, I'll be casually touching you too."
Uh, maybe she ought to meet up with her dearest. But, she doesn't want to disturb him if he is too busy.
"Can't you just find people for me to beat up?"
Toh rolled his eyes. "Are you that against my plan?"
"No, err, I don't mind drinking your blood Toh. But, I really think I should get rid of my blood lust urges physically too-" Sumire paused mid-sentence realizing how misleading her words sound. "I mean physically as in-I-"
Toh brushed his fingers across her lips. "You don't have to behave so strangely around me, beautiful. I know you remember that I confessed to you when you didn't have your memories. But, I don't want you to feel burdened by it."
"It's not a burden!" Sumire exclaimed.
In fact, it made her happy and that's why it hurts. Because deep down there's still something there for Toh. But, if she were to ever acknowledge that, it would hurt Yuhi, and Yuhi? Yuhi has already sacrificed enough to be with her.
Even before she regained her memories of her past life, she knew how much Yuhi sacrificed. Now with those memories, her resolve has gotten stronger. She can't let him down. Her thoughts break off when Toh suddenly pulled her onto the couch so they were both sleeping side by side.
"Just close your eyes for now, beautiful. I'll wake you when it's time to go."
She wasn't sleepy, and they needed to talk. But, Sumire knew she couldn't argue with him, so she listened and closed her eyes. Waiting until he drifted off.