The Sins of Anna Chapter 44 Fear 12.2

~What is this, blood? My bare feet are walking across the cold wooden floor a trail of blood before me. The pictures on the wall are all shredded. I run faster following the blood. Ahead there are large white double sided doors as I burst through them. Bodies are everywhere. Where is he I look around frantically? I see a gun across the way on a dead faceless body, grabbing it I Rush out through two glass doors across the way. It's so bright, the sun blazing down on my eyes that are accustom to the shadows of the house. The garden is painted red. Where is he? Ren! I shout. Where are you! Ren! Please! I scream pleadingly.~
Waking up, I jump sitting up. I gasp for air feeling like I'm suffocating. I can feel the warm liquid flowing from my eyes as the tears drip down onto my blanket. Looking around everything's dark and I'm alone. Ren, Where is Ren? Climbing out of bed I slip on a robe and run out of the room. Panting and panicked I bump into something hard.
"What's up with you." The voice I longed to hear is ringing in my ears as I looked up to see I had run into Ren in the hall.
Suddenly I'm grabbing his arm, my hands trace around his body quickly as if unable to believe he's here he's okay. I feel my knees start to buckle as I plop to the ground.
"You stupid, idiot, jerk, you left me all alone," I whale as I start bawling out in frustration.
"It was just a nightmare." Ren's calm voice whispers in my ear, he was on the ground holding me. He patted my head I wrap my arms around his firm body trying to control my own shaking body. Tears streaming down with no end in sight.
"Can you walk?" Ren whispers questioningly as he's trying to support me. All I could do was nod and try to stand.
Ren looks back over his shoulder. When he does I notice noise coming from around the corner someone had been coming. I was so stupid making a commotion out in the halls like that. I was so terrified I wasn't thinking. Back in the room I sit on the couch feeling so dumb waiting for my punishment. Ren fetches me water saying nothing. Now that I get a good look at him he was in just his pajama bottoms. My eyes glued to his succulent body as he stood in front of me.
"What are you staring at my sweet." Ren's expression became almost sinister with delight.
"Nothing!" I quickly try to turn away but my eyes fail me as they glace back over.
He walks closer leaning over me. "You want me." His voice, his smell, his eyes, his movement everything made me want him.
I nod in agreement, I missed his touch. Leaning in to kiss me, I push him back. Does he think just because I want him I will let him. He left me all alone in here and who knows where he's been I was frustrated and miserable. I glare at him he's not so hot shit that he can just come and get what he wants after refusing to share the bed with me without saying even a word. He looks down amused as he sleeks his hair back.
"What's wrong I thought you wanted me to touch you." His damn smug look was on his face again. I fold my arms grumpily under my chest. The dream had faded as he stood before me and now I was upset more then I wanted to admit, I hated that I loved this man sometimes.
"Do you even want to touch me!" Snapping back in frustrated. He won't even sleep in the same bed as me even though he was the one that moved me into this room. Then what he wants to take advantage of my desire for him only when it suits him. I do want him and I'm sure he thinks I'm being childish but that's not the point. I want him to want to be with me to sleep with me not to just come for sex. He looked at me surprised.
"Why wouldn't I?" He casually says taking a seat next to me his long legs crossing on top of each other elegantly in one smooth motion and his arm falling down around my shoulder.
"Why you ask." I mumble. "Because you have me move in here and your never here, I feel like the second it became okay to have me as much as you want you disappeared." I'm sure I'm acting like a pouting child right now but damn it I don't care.
I watch as he scratches his head looking away then glances at me from the side, then looks straight on across the room toward the windows.
"I had thought with the training it be best to give you space. I had been sleeping on the couch in Maliki's room for the time being. Especially after today, I hurt you so much I pondered if you would be so mad you would want to just shoot me yourself. With your skills I don't think you would miss either. It's not easy fighting the woman I love you know. I couldn't stand the thought of seeing the hate in your eyes for me after hurting you and berating you." I can almost hear a sigh escape his lips as he finishes explaining. Removing his arm from around my shoulders he blowing his hot breath into his now cupped hands as he glances over at me again waiting for me to speak I assume.
Is this really, why he isn't with me. I glance at him unable to speak feeling childish. I should have known. I'm his soon to be wife I should understand how he thinks shouldn't I?
"Why Maliki's room?" Is all that I could ask.
"Too keep the men from talking. We go to his room often to discuss matters so, less questions. It be pretty pathetic don't you think to see your fearless and ruthless leader hiding from his wife in another room." He smirks with a soft laugh. I can't help but giggle at that to imagining him afraid of me though I doubt that would ever happen.
"If you're not going to kill me." He says partly laughing. "I guess I will sleep here from now on." He casually stands heading to the bed. I feel a little annoyed how he acted at this moment that it doesn't matter if I was upset or not and just heads to bed.
"Leave me alone again, and I promise I will shot you." I mumble as I get up following him. I can hear him laugh from over by the bed. Guess that means he heard me and, he doesn't think I'm serious, jerk.
"Hey Ren, you idiot, wake up, don't go to sleep! You need to finish what you had started, you jerk!"