Megami Buchigire Chapter 54 - All Culture Points Towards Food

Chapter 54: All Culture Points Towards Food

Budget meeting.
As its name implies, it is the place where the budget submitted by the Cabinet is deliberated upon, but for some reason it tends to descend into chaos where things like politicians’ corruption and the disbanding of idol groups is discussed instead.
You guys, return to the main topic already.
“…… As such, someone needs to be held accountable for—”
“Ahh, sorry, you guys. May I have a moment?”
“Yes?”
It is in the middle of such deliberations when Linbel-san suddenly interrupts an opposition party member and makes her way towards the middle of the Diet hall.
Incidentally, she is currently wearing a black pantsuit.
The miko uniform that many, many, many guys were holding great expectations for was rejected by Linbel-san herself with a “that’s not something to be worn during normal times.”
Miko-san ha (Miko-san must)
Heiji mo miko fuku (Always wear their miko clothes)
Kinakya dame darou?! (Or else it’s no good at all!)
(The seasonal word: miko fuku)1
“Wh-, what is it, Linbel-san. Right now it’s my question time so if you have something to say please say it la—”
“Isekai Issues Countermeasure Committee Member Linbel-kun.”
“Chairman?!”
The opposition member was in the right, but the Chairman still gave Linbel-san the right to speak, so question time is on hold for now.
Incidentally, ‘Isekai Issues Countermeasure Committee Member’ is something that the Chairman said on a whim. No such organization has been established. Yet.
“I apologize for taking up everyone’s time. But just now, I received an oracle from Amaterasu-sama, which I shall now read out loud: ‘Can I summon an otherworlder to the Diet right now? I can, right? I’m begging you, please say yes!’”
What is an oracle again.
The Diet members are all speechless at Amaterasu-sama’s desperate tone, but Linbel-san herself only has gentle eyes like a grandma looking at her grandchild. There’s the power of age for you.
“Is there a specific reason for the rush?”
“Not really. Apparently Amaterasu-sama herself planned on waiting for a while after explaining to the person before arranging the summoning, but the person is making a fuss about wanting to come to Japan immediately.”
——Nandeyanen.
What with Makami-san and Ognil-san, since when has Japan become something like a popular tourist spot for people of other worlds?
“Well, the person is cooperative but quite self-centered and stubborn-headed. Ever since a while ag-……ah, they’re already coming.”
——Nandedayo?!
If they’re coming anyways, then what was the meaning of that request just now? So tsukkomis the Tsukkomi Diet League led by the young Diet member.
But as if in complete disregard of the Diet members’ tsukkomi, suddenly there is a pathetic puff of smoke in the middle of the Diet hall.
“Fumu. So this place is the country of Hinomoto.”2
The one who has appeared is a young-looking woman with blond hair.
Her body is slender yet perfectly portioned, which together with her stunning beauty combines into an appearance worthy of being described as the very personification of beauty.
However, this woman has something even more attention-grabbing than her beauty.
Those ears that are peeking through her long blond hair. They are tapered like antennas like a certain other person’s.
——Elf KITA——(゜∀゜)━━ !!!!
A certain BBS site and Twitter almost crashed, but barely managed to hang in there.
After experiencing several holy crusades, even servers get stronger every day.
“Welcome to Japan. I am serving as the Prime Minister, and go by the name of Adachi.”
After only a sidelong glance at the still-bewildered Diet members, our reliable Prime Minister smoothly slips into action.
It’s a secret that he’s actually a little bit excited at the arrival of this otherworlder, as it has been quite a while since the previous one.
“I am greatly obliged at your courteous reception. I hail from the tribe of elves living within the Forest of Lotus. My name is Inelteia.”
“Inelteia-san. It appears that you are here in response to a reverse-summon, so does that mean there was a Japanese person who appeared close to you?”
“There was indeed. In fact, I am here with the intention of offering an apology in regards to that matter.”
——Again?
Upon hearing Inelteia-san’s words, most of the Diet members have grasped the general gist.
“The telling might get a little long. So, I belong to what’s known as the Radical Faction among the elves, and might even go so far to say that I scorn most other elves.”
“Why would that be?”
“Because they are just slothful!”
Inelteia-san’s instant reply to Adachi-kun’s question merely leaves him with his head tilted in puzzlement.
“In general, elves as a race is just too laidback. Whenever anything happens, they say ‘let’s do it tomorrow.’ They say tomorrow but in the end it’s a whole year until anything actually gets done! And this is their default mode, you hear me?! And even worse, ‘there’s no problem with it, so it’s fine to just let it be’!! Is there anything more foolish than stagnation under the excuse of maintaining status quo?!”
Around the end of her speech, Inelteia-san is completely shouting, as if all her built-up stress is exploding at once. Her face looks like that of a hannya’s3, which looks even scarier with how beautiful she is.
Apparently Inelteia-san is a high-strung kind of elf who feels strongly about “change.”
Then there is Graios-san, the one who’s been living with laidback-ness at full throttle even since coming to Japan, thinking ‘ah, she should try living a more laidback life’ while looking at her heartwarmingly.
“…… I beg your pardon. I got a bit too excited back there and ended up raising my voice.”
“We do not mind. It is clear that it is a matter that you feel strongly about.”
“Adachi is a kind person. Haah, Isao was too.”
After regaining her calm, Inelteia-san exhales once before resuming.
“I, who was extremely troubled by the elves’ way of life, gathered together with those shared my sentiments and brainstormed about how to encourage development in our race. After much discussion, we decided to look to the humans for reference.”
“The humans, you say?”
“Yes. Though it is true that in comparison to us elves, humans are far more fragile and short-lived, there are those who attain even more strength and skill within their short lifespans than what we elves possess. So we thought to follow the example of such humans. However, we live deep in a forest, and due to the village’s laws, we could not easily step outside. Thus, we resolved so summon a human possessing deep knowledge who can instruct and guide us.”
By this point, most of the Diet members can guess the final result.
Some of them even want to complain ‘Isn’t the wall between worlds too thin?!’
“But the person that we summoned turned out to be an elderly man from another world. He himself merely laughed it off, saying that he is happy at the opportunity to experience something fresh despite there being only a little bit left of his lifespan, and he was more than happy to listen to our shameless wish. However, it is fact that we called him to a foreign land, without his consent, and also without a way to send him back. We had taken the ritual too lightly, thinking that it would at the most summon someone from a nearby country. It was entirely our fault.
When we heard of this reverse-summoning, we intended to ask Amaterasu-sama whether or not this could allow Isao to return to Japan. However, Isao himself said ‘I cannot do something so irresponsible as to return with everything left half-done’ and rejected our suggestion. Thus I have responded to the reverse-summon, in way of apology.”
Isao-san is so cool.
The entire country sends thoughts of respect towards the grandpa teacher who got summoned to another world.
“Though it was unintentional, the fact is that we abducted a citizen from your country. I am willing to accept any form of judg—”
“Well calm down for now, child.”
“Who is a ‘child’! I’ll have you know I recently passed a hundr—?!”
Inelteia-san is instantly enraged at being called a ‘child,’ but upon turning around and seeing Linbel-san’s figure, she freezes as if struck by lightning.
“H-, High Elf? Wait, no, this aura, could it be—?!”
It seems that she’s realized that Linbel-san is a Royal Elf.
The Japanese don’t know this, and even she herself has almost forgotten it, but Royal Elves are actually quite amazing elves.
It is only natural that Inelteia-san reflexively falls to her knees in spite of the difference between elves and dark elves.
“I beg your pardon, oh august dark one.”
“U-wah, it’s been ages since I last saw this reaction. Well, don’t be so stiff. Have some of this.”
“Th-, this is?”
“Once I heard that a brethren is coming, I immediately went to heat it up.”
What Linbel-san is holding out is Shiina-san’s homemade bento.
The main item in it today is yaki onigiri. When it’s warmed up, its power is Magnification Don.3
“This is this country’s…?”
“Indeed. There’s no need for words, as food does not lie. Eat up.”
Prompted by Linbel-san, Inelteia-san slowly brings a yaki onigiri to her mouth.
The moment it enters her mouth, her eyes shoot wide open, and she begins chewing single-mindedly.
“……”
After swallowing the last morsel, she wordlessly stands up and turns towards Adachi-kun.
“I pledge my allegiance to this country.”
“Umu.”
——Nandedayo?!
There is Inelteia-san who’s just pledged something, and there is Linbel-san nodding in approval. Then there is the young Diet members tsukkomi-ing.
Today, too, Japan is at peace.
・
・
・
My arbitrary and prejudiced ranking of reasons why foreigners don’t want to leave Japan:
3) Technology and other stuff being convenient
2) Safety
1) The food is delicious (most important)
Today, too, Japan is at peace (2nd time).
1 This is supposed to be a haiku, which is a form of Japanese poem with a certain number of syllables spread out over 3 lines (traditionally: 5-7-5 distribution). The defining characteristic of a haiku is that it must include a word that references a season; the syllables are not so strict in “free form.” Clearly the one here is a joke.
2Hinomoto is the old name for Japan.
3 We’ve explained it before, so here’s just the pic for your reference:
4 The reference that more English-speaking people would recognize (and also where I got the translation of this word from) is the specific Yu-Gi-Oh! card which is an activated card for Quiz-type monsters. However, the phrase itself goes even further back, to a legendary Japanese quiz show called Quiz Derby that aired from 1976 to 1992, which once reached a high point of 40.8% in television ratings. The phrase “倍率ドン！ さらに倍(Bairitsu don! Sara ni bai)” is the line said by the MC at the very last question that grants double the number of points, enabling other contestants come up from behind in an upset. (Sorry the last 3 links are in Japanese.)