Megami Buchigire Chapter 47 - The Fearfulness of Miso Soup

Chapter 47: The Fearfulness of Miso Soup

——WHAT DID YOU SAY——?!
In Meldeia Kingdom’s royal palace.
A roar from the one who has recently become known all over the country as a famous knight aka Yuuki Kokushou aka Onee echoes towards the blue sky.
“The Vice-Commander is shouting again. Wonder what the Grand Commander did again this time?”
“Everyday it’s either Vice or Grace, or both, that’s shouting. And because of the Grand Commander more often than not.”
The nearby knights pay Onee’s shout no mind even while continuing their patrolling.
Thanks to the Grand Commander who’s supposed to calm commotions yet is actually the one who causes most of the commotions around here, the knights have already been trained to not be moved at any normal thing.
Though it sounds reliable, it also sounds like it might lead to the castle’s security becoming lax, so it is a slightly worrying development.
“But still, Grand and Vice sure have been getting along well lately.”
“Isn’t it just that Vice has gotten used to handling Grand?”
“I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about, you know, like between a male and a woman.”
“…… Come on, that’s impossible. Vice isn’t interested in women. But even if his taste is normal, Grand is just out, man.”
“I guess you’re right. Even if for argument’s sake Vice is normal, that man woman is just out, I agree.”
“I see. So a man woman like me is ‘out,’ huh.”
““……””
A female voice sudden cuts into their conversation.
That which came from behind their backs causes the two knights to freeze like rusted dolls.
“Oi run aw—”
“Hmph!”
“Guoraba?!”
The knights immediately attempt to make a dash for it upon comprehending their situation, but even before they can put strength into their legs, their heads have been clutched and then slammed together like an American grappler move.
“Ow…… OW! I so feel like my skull got cracked that I’m too afraid to even check!”
“S-, stars…… I can see so many pretty stars……”
“What drama queens. Humans aren’t that fragile.”
The figures of the two knights in agony causes the Grand Commander who had appeared suddenly to look exasperated.
Though it is true that the human skull is among the hardest parts of the body, its strength is about equal to that of a pumpkin, so even it would break if enough force is applied.
To be hit with the strength of someone who is able to go toe-to-toe with Onee? Let’s all just pray that the two knights don’t suffer any lasting after-effects.
“Please give us a break, Grand Commander. Unlike Grand Commander and Vice-Commander, we’re just normal people who’ve yet to graduate from being human.”
“Neither do I have memory of such a graduation. Furthermore, Yuki’s shout just now was not because of me. That was probably because of the queen consort who came from Galdeia.”
“Ahh, that person who comes from the same homeplace as Vice-Commander.”
The short-tempered queen consort Asahi-san is also quite famous in Meldeia for being from Japan like Onee.
The main connotation being ‘as expected of someone who came from the same place as Onee.’
“The other time, I witnessed her shouting “You traitor! How dare you betray my feelings!?” and then send Vice-Commander flying with a punch.”
“Are you serious? I once managed to land a hit on him by taking advantage of an opening made by Grace, but my sword literally just bounced off of his pecs.”
“As expected of someone from the same place as Vice-Commander.”
“True that. The Japanese are just amazing.”
Damage from misinformation due to Onee and Ouhi-sama continues spreading in this otherworld.
The Japanese government’s final weapon “It Is Regrettable” is just right around the corner.1
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Miso.
Its origin is argued over by both China and Japan, but either way, it has now become an essential ingredient for modern day Japan. There are many people who would even say that they can’t start a day without a bowl of miso soup.
The earliest records of it date to a thousand and several hundred years ago. At the start, it was a high class ingredient that only nobility could enjoy, but gradually the production method spread among the common class, until it became so pervasive that miso soup became a national dish.
Incidentally, by taking advantage of its long-lastingness, miso was simmered together with taro stem to make what’s known as imogara-nawa, which was what soldiers during the Kamakura and Sengoku eras ate as rations.2
It’s easy to carry and full of nutrients. I for one think that the JSDF should immediately add imogara-nawa to their rations.
More like, why is there no miso at all in their rations?!
“You… found miso?”
And upon hearing that Asahi had found this miso, Onee quivers with emotion.
Despite having married into royalty, Asahi-san’s footwork is light as ever. But it was because of the lightness of her footwork that she was able to acquire information on miso, so there’s nothing that can be said.
“Indeed. There’s a Japanese person who’s a chef in the Dwarven Kingdom. He was able to get some through a merchant that he has close ties to, but unfortunately the distance is so great that most normal ingredients would rot on the way.”
Incidentally, the country where miso is made, Homura, is located even further north than Fitzgald, tucked away in a corner all the way up there. No matter how long miso can keep, the distance is so great that there barely wouldn’t be enough time.
More like, most miso would go bad after 2 to 3 months under normal temperature.
Everyone, don’t be lazy and make sure to store your miso properly in your fridge.
“A Japanese chef…… Wait, don’t tell me, Asahi-chan…… Did you……?”
“Yes I did. It seems that he didn’t have enough ingredients, so he could only serve miso soup and rice. My body seems to be overflowing with energy after eating some Japanese food after all this while.”
“You’re horrible! Why didn’t you bring me along?!”
There is Ouhi-sama nodding with a satisfied expression, then there is Onee complaining with tears in his eyes.
For what it’s worth, Grace, who is standing by as a guard, tsukkomis silently “in the first place don’t go sneaking into other countries by yourself at the drop of a hat.” But unlike Onee, who has permission to ignore rank with Ouhi-sama on account of being from the same homeland, Grace cannot address her easily, so she has to swallow her words down.
The final fusion of Onee and Ouhi-sama that is always bursting with points to tsukkomi on gives Grace no end of stress on her stomach.
“Well, even I felt a bit bad about it. So that’s why I’m brought some back to share with you……”
“Really?! As expected of Asahi-chan! I love you!”
“Ah~hah~hah! Praise me more! Extol me! Worship me!”
Onee is shouting his love towards another country’s queen consort while sending her flying kisses, while said queen consort is holding aloft miso and laughing loudly.
It is truly regrettable that there is nobody present who can throw in a royal tsukkomi at this absurd spectacle.
Incidentally, at this time, the king of Galdeia felt something and spontaneously shouted “Damn you, Kokushou!” while immediately attempting to dash out of his office, but the knight guarding him pressed him back into his seat and said “please do your work.”
Showing no mercy even when his own lord is about to go on a rampage. Galdeia’s knights are quite excellent as well.
“Alright! Since I finally have miso in my hands, guess I have no choice but to display my cooking skills a little!”
“Sounds good! I’ll help too!”
Thus the macho man with bulging muscles puts on an apron decorated heavily with frills, and the queen consort also puts on a matching apron over her dress.
——Oi. We’re begging you, please stop them.
The other knights are petitioning Grace with their eyes, but Grace herself just shakes her head with an empty smile on her face.
Today, too, this otherworld is at peace.
1 遺憾の意 (ikan no i): ‘emotion of regret’ Apparently Japanese politicians use this phrase every single time there’s an issue, to the degree where the citizens totally make fun of that phrase.
2 The miso seeps into the stem, so that when the soldier wants to eat, he just has to cut a certain amount of the stem off and chuck it into a pot of boiling water. The miso would then come back out, and voila, there’s his miso soup. As both miso and taro stems are readily available during the time (Kamakura: 1185-1333CE ; Sengoku: 1467-1568CE), this was a very common choice as rations. (J. Wiki)