Lazy Dungeon Master Chapter 250

The Outing’s Conclusion
Previously: We bought bananas from a grocer.
Honestly, a few people have been following us for a while now.
Are they Mai O’Doll’s acquaintances…? There’re two or three adult males who look a bit shady, like they feel like they’re about to rob someone.
Hmm.
Maybe they’re guards the lord sent out to guard her from behind the scenes.
As evidence of that, they haven’t made a move on us. A genuine thief would’ve already had a decent number of chances to cause a stir and swoop off with her.
But sure, this works.
Mai O’Doll still looked like she wanted to go somewhere, but it’s about time for us to head back to the mansion.
“Mai-sama, let’s head back.”
“Eeeh I wanted the date to last a bit longer… can’t we?”
“No. You’re being escorted… Please, look that way secretly. See the men that look like a thieves?”
“Eh!? …. I-is there? Aren’t they from the Pavuera family?”
Oh, was that it? Nobles spying on each other?
… Von O’Doll making me into her guard was probably also to show off and get information. Let’s hurry up and head back by devoting myself to my job as her guard. If I keep doing my work here indifferently, even they shouldn’t misunderstand.
“Which is why we’ll be ending our stroll here. Alright?”
“Aww… but Kehma-sama, if you just dealt with them…”
“My job here as your guard is to not expose you to dangerous matters… Do you want to be carried like a princess all the way back so that we could hurry?”
“Eh!? … L-like a princess? U-umm, do you mean… that ‘like a princess’?”
I don’t know what she meant by ‘that‘, but it looks like she understood what the carry is.
Mai O’Doll thought about something for a while, twisting and curling the ringlets in her blue hair. She then turns back to me and spoke with determination.
“Then, u-umm… please!”
“Sure, let’s head off then… Kuro, carry the Ojou-sama.”
“Okay.”
“Eh—”
It’s not like I ever said I would do it.
Mai O’Doll’s face filled with confused puzzlement, Meat suddenly picked her up and started carrying her.
Now for the assist functionality of the clothes golem to shine.
*
Upon reaching the mansion, Meat let Mai O’Doll down.
We made those thief-looking people eat our dust. The victory goes to the clothes golem’s boost… My hips hurt.
“Y-you’re fast. I wasn’t shook around at all. You’re much stronger than you look.”
“Ehen.”
Meat was as expressionless as ever, but she still puffed her chest out in pride. Right, maybe she just expresses herself with her body instead of her face?
“… But I wanted you to do it for me, Kehma-sama. The princess carry.”
“Unfortunately, I’m weak. I leave the physical labor to Kuro.”
“Kehma-sama, please give me a princess carry next time.”
“If there’s another opportunity, I will.”
“I’ll be growing up fast from here on, though. It’s an easy chance for you to do it now!”
“What, I said I’m weak, but I can at least carry a woman. It’s alright even if I don’t do it now.”
“Uhuhuhu.”
“Hahaha.”
Mai O’Doll hid her mouth with her hand as she laughed. Even though she’s so small, this loli is an aristocrat.
“Well then, how about we go report to Von O’Doll-sama?”
“You can princess carry me to Otou-sama’s room…”
“Outside of emergencies, I refrain from touching ladies in peaceful moments.”
“Muu, even though I wouldn’t mind…”
Mind it! Rather, I just want to go back home.
I went to Von O’Doll’s office, Meat and Mai O’Doll in tow.
Knocking on the door, I went in after getting permission. Von O’Doll was working on paperwork at his desk. Placing his fountain pen back in its holder, he smiled at us.
“Welcome back. That went fairly quickly, I thought you would have played for a bit longer?”
“Yeah, we had finish early due to a few suspicious fellows. Also, is it alright if I complete the guard escort commission with this?”
“Sure. What sort of fellows were they?”
I briefly explained the characteristics of the men I saw. Von O’Doll nodded, his expression unchanging for the most part. I guess it was the Von O’Doll sent them as guards route after all? It was a great excuse.
“… So, what about you? Have you decided to become Mai’s fiance?”
He said it like me becoming her fiance was a done deal.
But I refuse.
“On that, I shall refuse.”
Right next to me, Mai O’Doll seemed to deflate when I said that.
“Hmm… might I ask for your reason? You two only met yesterday, but I assume you would have learned at least a little about her in that time?”
“First off, nothing’s changed in the past half day. Secondly, honestly, I prefer my women bigger.”
“Hmm… that so?”
Ah, he hasn’t given up. He looks like he’s thinking about what hand to play next right now.
But you’ve activated my trap card! I’ll stop that train of thought in its tracks!
“Could I say something, Von O’Doll-sama? On this matter, I do have an idea.”
“Hmm? What?”
“Before that—”
I took a glance at Mai O’Doll. Von O’Doll seemed to have guessed my intention.
“Mai, please head back to your room.”
“… Awww. Kehma-sama, I, I won’t give up!”
Listening to Von O’Doll, Mai O’Doll exited the room after a little hesitation.
“Mai seems to like you quite a bit. Did something happen?”
“I didn’t intend to do anything that would cause it.”
“Well, I’ll have Mai tell me about it later. So, what was your suggestion?”
I smiled from ear to ear.
Eat it—my revenge!
“It’s just a proposal… but to be frank, she doesn’t exactly need to be engaged to a man, right?”
“…!? W-what do you mean?”
“Exactly what I said. I recommend that Kuro here be used for Mai-sama’s feigned engagement.”
Very straightforwardly, I presented Meat to him.
“I have several reasons… but mainly, she’s my party member, so she has the same achievements as me as an adventurer. Moreover, I can guarantee that she has a proven track record in the administration of Golen Village. All of my achievements are thanks to Kuro.”
And I guarantee that all of my achievements are actually entirely because of Meat! I will continue to insist this, I will not accept any objections!
Meat looked my way. She was surprised. Von O’Doll was surprised, too.
“So, is there any other prestige she’d need?”
“… Well, let’s say that her being a woman is alright. She’s even close to Mai in age… But isn’t she a slave? She has a collar on.”
“Kuro just likes wearing it. I am more or less supposed to be her master, but Kuro only wears that because she has a master fetish and can’t settle down without wearing it. Von O’Doll-sama, you had a son, correct? In other words, even if I married Mai-sama, it isn’t like I would become the lord… it’s not like it matters either way, though. At any rate, it’s just a feigned engagement, so it isn’t as though the marriage would actually happen.”
I prattled on and on with a sound argument, causing Von O’Doll to flinch somewhat.
“Y-yeah…? Could I consider it?”
“Then for your consideration, I shall add this.”
Time for the final blow. I took out Meat’s Adventurer Guild Card and showed it to him.
It was what we got from Haku-san… Ventulier, was it? I’m sure it had a noble rank like that. In other words, her B-Rank Guild Card was also proof of her nobility.