The Returner Chapter 82

"I don't need to go?" (Gah-Yun)
Doh Gah-Yun asked, and in reply, Yi Ji-Hyuk nonchalantly seeped on his coffee.
"Yep. No need for you to go." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Why not?" (Gah-Yun)
Yi Ji-Hyuk lightly clicked his tongue.
There was this thing called 'classes' back in Berafe. And, the notion of 'classes' also existed within Earth's ability users.
Technically speaking, Doh Gah-Yun was an assassin class.
But, the truth was, no matter how good she was dealing with humans, there was a limit she couldn't overcome when it came to fighting monsters.
"Well, it'll be useless, that's why." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….."
"Don't worry about it. I mean, look at that human baggage we have over here." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Hey! I'm not a human baggage!" (Jeong Hae-Min)
Having been demoted to the role of 'human baggage' in an instant, Jeong Hae-Min angrily rushed to him to lodge her protest, before rolling away in an unsightly manner after Yi Ji-Hyuk lightly smacked her on the head.
"What is wrong with that girl's personality, I wonder?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
What about your personality, then? (Gah-Yun's inner retort)
Gah-Yun deeply suppressed the urge to hit him with a legitimate and very pertinent question. Well, there was no need to voice her feelings at this point in time, anyways.
"Useless? I am?" (Gah-Yun)
"Yup." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Gah-Yun could only bite her lip at his prompt reply.
"I see." (Gah-Yun)
She nodded her head very slightly and stood there in silence. Seeing this, Jeong Hae-Min stopped rubbing her sore forehead and began pointing her fingers at Yi Ji-Hyuk.
"Hey, how can you say something like that?! She's not useless, you know!" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"I only said useless because it's the truth." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"There is no useless person in this world, don't you know that?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"Eh? But, we have one right here?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….You mean, me?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"Heh. You are pretty quick on the uptake." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
When Yi Ji-Hyuk nodded his head as if he was praising her or something, Jeong Hae-Min reddened up in fury and began throwing sand at him.
Yi Ji-Hyuk covered his drink and stopped the sand from entering the cup, while a deep frown formed on his face.
"Have you made enough money until now? Because, if you don't start behaving soon, the hospital fee after I beat you up good will be considerable, you know?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Hah? Don't worry, 'cuz I'm gonna sue you for it!" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"That's only if you can actually make it to your lawyers first!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Hmph! Who says our Gah-Yun is useless? Don't you know how important her role is?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"What is?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Ng?"
"What is so important, as you say? Isn't she someone who only knows how to follow people around, am I right?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"T, that is important too, you know!" (Jeong Hae-Min)
Yi Ji-Hyuk chuckled and leaned against the deck chair.
"Yup, yup. There is no useless person in the world, sure. Even the homeless bum you find sleeping in the subway station is important, too." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Stop being sarcastic, will you?! You really have a twisted personality, don't you!!" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"Not as bad as a certain shorty's, though. Hey, since you haven't shown up on TV for a few days, surely most people have forgotten about you by now." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Jeong Hae-Min shuffled towards the shade under a tree, hugged her knees, and began darkly murmuring "That's not true, that's not true," repeatedly to herself. Seeing this, all Yi Ji-Hyuk could do was to spat out a lengthy groan.
"….Useless, I tell ya." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
He shook his head and shifted his gaze away, only to find Doh Gah-Yun still standing on the exact same spot as before.
"What now?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
It seemed that she still had something to say.
"I wish to be useful." (Gah-Yun)
"Mm?"
"A useful, effective human." (Gah-Yun)
Tsk.
"You should focus on what you're good at. Different people have different uses, see." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Uses?" (Gah-Yun)
"No matter how hard you try, you'll never win against him over there." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
At the place Yi Ji-Hyuk was pointing to, there was a small puppy-like animal busy licking its own palm.
'So cute.' (Gah-Yun)
Even Doh Gah-Yun found herself being sucked into the shaggy-tastic-ness of the creature.
However, that was only for a second!
That thing was still a dang Ogre!
Even though it looked like that now, that thing was a mighty creature that could rip her apart with nothing but its fingernails!
If she somehow grew stronger, could she be able to fight and win against an Ogre?
Impossible.
She didn't want to, but she had to accept the fact.
"Here's the thing, though. Let's say that Seo Ah-Young becomes strong enough to beat Oh-Sik." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Ng."
"In that case, does that mean you can't beat Seo Ah-Young anymore?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"……."
"That's not true, right?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Mm…."
Didn't matter how strong Seo Ah-Young got, as long as Gah-Yun found an opening, she'd be able to stick a knife on the Flame Witch's back.
"You should consider the compatibility between different classes. In other words, focus on what you do best. Nothing will change even if you go over to that side and slaughter hundreds of monsters. The important thing is this - you want to be useful? Then, focus on developing your own strengths." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….Ah."
Gah-Yun stood there, her lips bobbing up and down, apparently still wanting to say something. But she shut her mouth and nodded her head.
"Oh well. Even if you try, it'll still be useless, though." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
It'd be so much nicer if you didn't add any unnecessary comments that just p*ss people off even more, though!
No, wait - instead of 'nicer', you'd come off less like an a*shole! (Gah-Yun's inner monologue)
"What needs to be done, to develop my strengths?" (Gah-Yun)
"Continue with what you've been doing." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Yi Ji-Hyuk pointed back at the jungle.
"It's not that you're slow, you simply can't sense the presence. The moment when you can perfectly sense the presence of the b*stard entering your sensory space, then you'd have ascended to the next level." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Okay." (Gah-Yun)
Doh Gah-Yun walked over to the jungle's entrance as soon as they finished talking. Meanwhile, Jeong Hae-Min approached Yi Ji-Hyuk's side with a depressed face.
"What about me?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"There's nothing you can do. Oh, but you can fetch me some popcorn, though." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Stop thaaaat and be serious!" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"Just go and practice dancing or something! You always get your choreography wrong, you know!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Ah."
Yi Ji-Hyuk flinched.
Did I go overboard just now?
I mean, she's still a reliable shuttle that ensures my timely departure and arrival at home and all, so….
Yi Ji-Hyuk was about to say something to soothe her, but then, Jeong Hae-Min rushed towards him with a pair of sparkling eyes.
"You, you've secretly saw me performing on stage, haven't you!!" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"That's not iiittt?!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
How did she go from here to there?!
What kind of a development is this? (Yi Ji-Hyuk's dumbfounded inner monologue)
Yi Ji-Hyuk hastily tried to push away Jeong Hae-Min's face away from him.
"Hey, get away from me!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"You are one of those 'abrasive on the outside, but cares a lot inside' type, aren't you? So? How was it? Did you like the concert?" (Jeong Hae-Min) (TL: My editor said, "he's a tsundere!" LOL.)
"Like? Like my a*s, you fool!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Yi Ji-Hyuk kicked Jeong Hae-Min in the a*s and got up from the deck chair while breathing heavily.
Not one person is sane in this place! Not even one! (Yi Ji-Hyuk's inner monologue)
"Eii, I'll give you a signed CD if you say you liked what you saw, you know." (Jeong Hae-Min)
"What should I do with a crap that no one wants to buy, even on eB*y?!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….It won't sell?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
Jeong Hae-Min got depressed again. Seeing that extreme swing in her moods, Yi Ji-Hyuk spat out yet another groan.
Seriously now, one should know how to be crazy in moderation.
"Hey, come over here." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Ng?"
"You asked me about how you can get stronger just now, right?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….Ng?"
"Let's go." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Jeong Hae-Min's eyes grew extra larger with worry in that moment, and she quickly asked him.
"To where?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"What do you mean, where?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
A sinister smile crept up on Yi Ji-Hyuk's lips.
"We're going on a tour, that's what." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….A tour of Korea?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"No~pe." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"T, then, to where?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
Yi Ji-Hyuk grasped the back of her neck and lifted her up.
"For now, let's go to the nearest place from here - to the USA!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"How is that the nearest place?! Are you crazy?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"People talk about that place the most, so it must be the nearest! Okay, let's get going, Miss Shuttle!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
What kind of bullsh*t logic was this?!
"Don't you even know what common sense is?!" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"Dunno, but it doesn't affect my everyday life in the slightest, so it's all good." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
But, but! You seem to be affected pretty badly to me, though?!
You can't say you're fine and dandy when you behave like this in public!
A human being should have some conscience, right?! (Jeong Hae-Min's inner screaming)
Jeong Hae-Min spat out a long groan with a distorted face. This guy here, he was the type who would do what he said he'd do.
Better shut up and just do as told.
"So, where in the USA?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
"Let's go to their capital! Off to New York!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Oh. Uhm….
I've got a ton of things to retort with, but I can't.
I can't tell where I should even begin….
Okay, let's see. I should say…. (Jeong Hae-Min's inner monologue)
"Hmm. I've got lots of fans in New York, though?" (Jeong Hae-Min)
When she saw how unsightly Yi Ji-Hyuk's expression crumpled, she quickly averted her gaze.
Maybe that wasn't it?
"Should I help you with making new fans in the middle of an African savannah, too?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….I'm very sorry." (Jeong Hae-Min)
"Let's go." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Okay!" (Jeong Hae-Min)
Poof.
As Yi Ji-Hyuk and Jeong Hae-Min disappeared from the spot, they left behind a lone man who was standing there shaking in his boots.
"W, what about me….?" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
….Why am I guarding this island in the middle of nowhere all by myself….?
There is only Doh Gah-Yun here, somewhere, but that's pretty much the same thing as having nobody around you….
No, I'd actually prefer being alone at this point. So why…. (Choi Jung-Hoon's inner monologue)
"Keureureuk." (Oh-Sik)
….Why did you leave me behind along with your monster pals?! (Choi Jung-Hoon's inner monologue)
As soon as Yi Ji-Hyuk was gone, the large monsters began to inch towards him. Seeing this, Choi Jung-Hoon's entire body began trembling in fear.
This, this is so wrong.
You guys, why are you coming in closer to me?
You all trying to get friendly?
Or…. Maybe? (Choi Jung-Hoon's inner monologue)
"Are you… hungry?" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
"Keureuk." (Oh-Sik)
Did the monster nod its head? Or was he imagining things?
"Really hungry?" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
"Keureuk." (Oh-Sik)
Ahh, so, they are hungry. Indeed, it was hunger.
In that case, you should eat, then. As for the food…. (Choi Jung-Hoon's inner monologue)
Oh-Sik stared at Choi Jung-Hoon and began drooling.
"….Me?" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
Ahh. So, it's me. I'm the food. (Choi Jung-Hoon's inner monologue)
Despair rapidly dyed Choi Jung-Hoon's face.
*
Poof.
"Argh. I'm too forgetful, aren't I? Dang it!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Yi Ji-Hyuk reappeared on the island along with Jeong Hae-Min. He complained while walking towards the makeshift tent.
"I forgot all about their food." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
He should've thought about tossing some food in the warp gate along with the ability users, since they were in a place with practically nothing to eat for humans. If he was a second too slow, they might've died of starvation, instead.
"So, like, where is the food…. Food…. Uh? What is that?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Yi Ji-Hyuk spotted a big bonfire burning in front of the tent just over yonder.
"Ng?"
"Why is there a fire over there?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Yeah, I wonder." (Jeong Hae-Min)
Did someone start a campfire?
Yi Ji-Hyuk walked over to the 'campfire' and ended up witnessing something rather peculiar: the bare-chested Choi Jung-Hoon was desperately stirring the contents of a large pot as if his life depended on it.
"Eh?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
And surrounding him was a cordon of drooling monsters, evidently waiting for something.
The sight of sweating Choi Jung-Hoon looked rather manly as he continuously stirred the contents of the pot.
It seemed that a handsome man could make any bizarre sight attractive to one's eyes.
"What are you doing?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"M, Mister Yi Ji-Hyuk!!" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
As soon as he spotted Yi Ji-Hyuk, Choi Jung-Hoon ran very hard and jumped on the youth with tears and snot covering his face.
"Eh?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Wail~~~!!"
"What the?! Hey, what's the matter with you, man?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"They, they wanna… They want to eat me!!" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
Huh?
So, let me get this straight…. They were trying to eat you alive, so in order to keep living, you began cooking every ingredient you could find in this place and try to serve them that?
What rubbish is this? (Yi Ji-Hyuk's inner monologue)
"These guys, they can't eat humans, though?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"Excuse me?" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
"Obviously, I made sure to place restrictions on such things. Isn't that, like, the basics?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….Oh." (Choi Jung-Hoon)
"Why are you wasting time doing something useless? And also…." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Yi Ji-Hyuk beckoned Oh-Sik over, and then slapped the monster's head, hard.
Ggegeng!!
"Cheeky little b*stard, busy teasing a poor guy like that!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
After receiving the blow, Oh-Sik trembled pathetically and then, lay down on the sandy ground while exposing its belly.
"What the? You trying to appeal to my sympathetic side or something? I shoulda just hit you some more…." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
….But, but, why is this thing so cute?
It's still an Ogre, though.
Okay, should I take this opportunity and adopt a baby Ogre as a pet? (Yi Ji-Hyuk's inner monologue) (TL: I thought Oh-Sik is your pet already? What gives?)
As Yi Ji-Hyuk stood there and seriously deliberated on his future plans, Choi Jung-Hoon collapsed to the ground while swallowing his tears.
What was the point of his desperate struggle up until just now?!
Seriously, he nearly wet himself whenever a monster near him displayed even the faintest hint of licking its lips.
He wanted to keep breathing for as long as he could, so he slavishly cooked for these bunch of dang monsters, yet it was all for nothing?
"….Sob."
Sensing the heaviness of Choi Jung-Hoon's despair, Yi Ji-Hyuk clicked his tongue.
'Even this guy is gradually becoming an idiot, isn't he?' (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Yi Ji-Hyuk shook his head and entered the tent, only to have his eyes open up wide in surprise.
"What the hell? Where did all the grub disappear to?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
The majority of the canned food he had Jeong Hae-Min bring over here in case people got hungry, were missing.
"….They ate them all." (Choi Jung-Hoon)
"Oh, is that right?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Now that Yi Ji-Hyuk thought about it, he also forgot to feed the monsters as well.
"Hey, Oh-Sik-ah?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Woof?
"Stop eating human food and go catch a whale or something if you're starving. Okay?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
….Woof!
Yi Ji-Hyuk figured that this should suffice.
He then reopened the warp gate and chucked in the remaining cans there, before closing it again. The rest was up to their fate.
Now that he took care of things, Yi Ji-Hyuk called Jeong Hae-Min over.
"Okay, let's get going again!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"W, wait! Take me with you, too!!" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
"Eh?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Choi Jung-Hoon clung on to Yi Ji-Hyuk's leg and begged.
"Don't leave me alone here!" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
"Why are you acting like a little kid?! You're a grown-a*s ahjussi, you know!!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Hey, you insane b*stard!!
You think being an ahjussi is the problem, when you left me behind with no one besides these monsters on an uninhabited island?!
This ahjussi is still a human being, too!!!! (Choi Jung-Hoon's inner monologue)
"Please!!!" (Choi Jung-Hoon)
"Okay, okay. Gee whiz. Hey, let's take along this dude, too." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….In that case, tell him to put his shirt back on. Oh, and wipe away all that sweat, too." (Jeong Hae-Min)
"You're right. He's a bit unhygienic, isn't he?" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
"….Sob."
Sorrow rushed in like a tidal wave, but what could Choi Jung-Hoon even do?
A short while later, Jeong Hae-Min, along with Yi Ji-Hyuk and the freshly-washed Choi Jung-Hoon, teleported away. The island descended into eerie quietness afterwards.
***
"Where is the promised support?!" (Jeong In-Soo)
"They said that they are on the way!!"
"What?! The Gate is about to open up right now!!" (Jeong In-Soo)
Jeong In-Soo shouted out loudly as he fixed his gaze on the Level 5 Gate that looked as if it'd open up at any moment.
"Contact Mister Choi Jung-Hoon on the phone. I want to talk to him!" (Jeong In-Soo)
"He said he's on the way…."
"I heard you the first time, so just call him already, you moron!" (Jeong In-Soo)
"Yes, sir."
Before that, though, he heard a voice coming from his behind.
"We're here, so there's no need for that." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Jeong In-Soo rejoiced and turned around to find Yi Ji-Hyuk and the NDF agents.
"Mister Yi Ji-Hyuk!! The Gate is about to open up!! No, wait! It's already opened!! Look!!" (Jeong In-Soo)
As Jeong In-Soo pointed at the Gate, it vibrated and hummed noisily, before opening up completely. Monsters began pouring out in droves.
"Please, do som…." (Jeong In-Soo)
"Shush."
Yi Ji-Hyuk stopped Jeong In-Soo mid-speech and formed a smirk. Then he bravely stepped forward.
I really….
….Wanted to say this at least once in my life! (Yi Ji-Hyuk's inner monologue)
"For a Gate, a gate is the answer!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Time to show what 'fighting fire with fire' truly means!
"Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce to you…." (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Jet-black Mana poured out from Yi Ji-Hyuk's hands and began constructing strange runes in the air - before they all condensed and spread out to form a big black warp gate.
"….The indomitable warriors returning from the pits of hell!!" (Yi Ji-Hyuk)
Vuoong!!
Yi Ji-Hyuk's gate buzzed softly, and then, several dark human-shaped shadows leaped out from there.
"Uwaaaaaaah!!"
"Where is Yi Ji-Hyuk?! Where is that motherf*cker?!"
"I'll kill him!! He's dead!!"
Even the monsters flinched after witnessing the vicious and barbaric aura emitting from these people.
The ones busy searching for Yi Ji-Hyuk stopped the moment they saw the monsters. Then, their eyes began shining in a dangerous light as they began crying out in unison.
"MEAT!! It's meaaaaat!!!"
….Meanwhile, Choi Jung-Hoon began wiping away the unending stream of tears wetting his face.
What a sad and pitiful group of people…. Just what did they go through over there….
In this world, some things were better off not knowing.
Fin.