Zaregoto Volume 3 Chapter 4

Ask God for a more detailed explanation.1

And then three hours later -- when it had gotten dark outside, Yukariki Ichime and Aikawa Jun and I were still in the dean's room. We had already become accustomed to the odor of meat and the odor of blood, and had finally settled down to the abnormal spectacle in front of us. Not that settling down to such a thing was anything worthwhile.
I did not know what Hime-chan thought of this situation, but she was flicking her fingers and playing around. It seemed like she was simply too bored, but maybe she was thinking, too.
As for Aikawa-san, she was the usual Aikawa-san, as she gorged on the rations stashed on the shelves in the room. Right now she was eating what seemed to be an expensive pastry. How could she eat such things with no problems at all in this situation, in this place? She must have nerves of steel, or is just insensitive. I wondered which.
"-- Jun-san, how long do you intend to stay here?"
"Huh? How many times're you gonna ask that?"
Aikawa-san crawled on all fours to me, a cookie still stuffed in her mouth.
"What? You hungry? I know, I know, when you get hungry, you get irritable."
"That is not--"
"Here. Ahhhh."
Aikawa-san stuffed the half-eaten cookie in my opened mouth.
Delicious.
"-- that is not what I mean! We do not know how close Shiogi-chan has come, yet we are still sitting here -- sitting at the crime scene, so they will suspect us even more."
"You're so hopeless! Why're you always like no this no that no that either no everything, so negative-. You Prince Negative. Ichihime, say something."
"Master. Political independents should sleep and wait-."
"What are you talking about."
This girl must be doing it on purpose, right?
"What she means, Ii-tan, is that in this situation, the worst thing to do is to wander around aimlessly. If we were to put this in shogi terms, we just got struck by a check, alright? It's not checkmate yet, but we're in quite a pinch. This requires deep thought."
"It is hard to tell a poor thinker from a sleeping one, or something, you mean?"
"Yup. So, a break, a break. Don't fret."
Said Aikawa-san, who then sprawled out on the floor. While dried by now, it was still blood-stained carpeting, so I could not help but wonder about her sanity.
"I think it would be easier to ask the police..."
"The police wouldn't come out for something like this. The dramatis personae are all messed up, and the school itself is like this, too. I feel sorry for him, but there's no place for Sasaki in this story."
"No, what do you mean all, I am an ordinary citizen. Please do not drag me into this. After all, I am a complete outsider this time, you know? This is what the police are for. Why do you think I am paying taxes."
"You pay? Even though you're a minor? That's rough. But Ii-tan, don't forget. The police are fundamentally a publicly owned company. They're protectors of the citizens who pay more."
Ahh, I see. And because this academy was backed by the Origami name and the Rule name, they are probably quite friendly with each other... I suppose in that case, the taxes I pay are like the tears of a sparrow. In that case, Sasaki-san and his partner would not show up. Well, granted, they did not have the right personality for this type of case.
"I will accept that... but staying here forever."
"And you know. I fixed the door and got it to lcok again, so there's no place safer than this room. After all, it's the dean's private room in the Hanging High School. Sound-proof germ-proof bullet-proof, can you think of a safer place?"
"And in such a case, the dean was killed..."
Also, Aikawa-san's use of the word safe was purely based off the physical aspect, and it was doubtful she included the mental aspect. After all, who would think the fugitive Yukariki Ichihime and her companions would be resting in the center of the academy, and in the dean's room at the top floor of the Faculty Ward, on top of that? In that sense staying here would certainly be going behind the enemy's back.
However, if you were to ask me -- this would not fall under messing with someone. Being unpredictable, or surprising someone, would not fall under going behind their back. That would be simply taking advantage of any oversight. And if you go into ablind spot recklessly, you become unable to move. You become captive to the escape route. I had experience, so I knew. Well, of course, this explanation meant nothing here.
And to me, one more thing -- something bothered me to the same level as Origami Noa's closed-room dismemberment.
'Somehow, we were able to clean this up before Zig Zag showed up--"
Shiogi-chan's mumbling at the time -- I did not know whether it was from relief or a letting down of her guard, but her mumble that seemed like she forgot about her situation for a just a moment.
Zig Zag -- it could not be some new Mobile Suit or something. Then, something that even the strategist Shiogi-chan wanted to keep sealed, still remained somewhere in this school?
"You know... considering you prefer keeping things vague, you really demand results."
Aikawa-san said, irritated.
"... What do you mean? Even coming from Jun-san, I cannot allow that to pass."
"You once said I am used to waiting or something. Yes, you're pretty patient. You could probably sit on top of a rock for three years. But that's only when you know the result. When you don't know what's going to happen, you become anxious. You may be used to waiting for something, but you're really bad at waiting for something you don't know about."
"You make it sound like the truth."
"Because I'm speaking from knowledge. Your roots lie in resignation and compromise. That's why when you don't know what to give up, who to negotiate with, like right now, it's probably hard on you. But you know, well, that. Yeah, you just hafta work at it, work hard-."
It seemed she had really become irritable halfway through, as she became apathetic. Work hard, she said, but I do not know what I am supposed to work hard at.
"No fighting- Master and Jun-san." Hime-chan butted in. "Let's be friends. Like, if we start kicking each other it's no good-."
"You're right. Friendship is a beautiful joy. Well, Ii-tan, if you want to leave this room, feel free. I don't intend to tie you up or restrain you. I won't reject comers and I won't stop leavers. But in that case, you're leaving on your own accord, so don't expect for me to come help."
"....."
"But you know, Ii-tan. Allow me this: the people in this academy, despite being in the middle of a completely pacified country, are sometimes those with goals, sometimes those with convictions, and sometimes those without any choice in the matter. They're all monsters who've stepped onto the path of danger."
"Monsters."
"Ii-tan, you seem to think of this place as a training facility or a nursing school, but while that's true, it has another purpose. Or rather, that other purpose is probably more important. In other words, this is a cover. Cover -- in other words. While they're students, the top end are basically top-class soldiers."
Then... as opposed to being a school, this was more like a private mercenary army. An armed forces composed of young girls. What era is this story from, I had to refrain myself from saying. Of course, this was contemporary. However, still.
"If you underestimate them as younger girls, then you'll get your legs swept out from under you. While you're in this room, this Aikawa Jun will guarantee you and Ichihime's safety, so just settle down. Don't entertain me anymore."
"... How about you, Hime-chan?" I asked Hime-chan. "An opinion... or rather, any suggestions, do you have any? Knowing the terrain, you've been here for a year, after all?"
"Uuu. Hime-chan thinks it's best to leave it to Jun-san. Hime-chan's still an apprentice and a failure, and Master is a newbie in these cases. So I think it's better to listen to the professional."
It was reasonable. So reasonable that it made me sick. Of course, I'd never heard reason that made me fel better.
"I agree that this is the safest. If anything, this is like the core of the Hanging High School as well as a secret [grave]yard."
"You mean base." The kanji are similar, I guess. "Apprentice... if you can evaluate yourself so well I do not think you need grade yourself so low."
"It's not grading myself low. People with odd powers tend to go overboard with it. Hime-chan feels this is a nice balance."
Overboard -- eh.
Overboard becomes delusion becomes disappearance, they say.
It was true... if you unnecessarily have an extreme power -- you use your power too much and go insane - I had seen a number of people like that. For example, the geniuses on that island, the failure at human. People who had powers rivaling that of the world itself, yet were in some way warped, people whom were balanced like that -- although in that case I could only think of Aikawa-san.
"Being powerless is actually a source of self-explosive for Hime-chan."
"Why are you becoming a terrorist."
She meant self-esteem, probably.
"Balance--"
-- in that case, what would that make me? According to Aikawa-san, Full of confidence despite not having anything -- filled with pride despite being completely empty -- people with inconsistencies. Would that make me the most unbalanced? But I am not warped. Am not. I think. I am pretty sure.
"I hope, that would be best."
I mumbled, and as usual, I muttered, "It is nonsense," and stopped thinking. Not having any political affiliation is 無党(mutou), while nihilist is 虚無党(kyomutou). 墓地 (hakachi) = graveyard, 基地 (kichi) = base Hard to translate this, but it's a pun-based idiom. 暴走 (bousou) is overboard/rampaging/berserking, where 暴 (bou) means violently (in terms of extremity). So, 暴走 into 暴想 (bousou), where 想 (sou) means imagination, a bit of a pun on 妄想 (delusion). Finally 暴喪 (bousou) using 喪 (sou), which means disappearance, or in this case person-instigated disappearance. 自爆 (jibaku) vs. 自慢 (jiman), the latter being pride, the former being self-destruct.2

For example, let us say that there is a user of nonsense that has the conviction that murder is a bad thing. Then how should he respond when he is asked this?
What's wrong with killing people on the battlefield?
What's wrong with a serial killer killing people?
The answer would probably look a bit like this -- that the existence of such things as battlefields and serial killers are wrong. Then how to respond when asked this?
Is it wrong for dogs to bite people to death?
Is it wrong for earthquakes to kill people?
Would he be able to answer that the existence of dogs, that the existence of earthquakes are wrong? Of course not, going there would be simple quibbling. Reasons that come from conviction and conviction that comes from reason are different things.
Situations where you must kill, or situations where you must be killed, without any shred of wavering or doubt exist. Yes, the reason to kill a person, that always exists as a sure thing. Even if there is no reason to not kill people, there are reasons to kill people. That is why the important thing is to avoid acquiring that reason, to crawl yourself through life -- having come to that conclusion, I slowly opened my eyes.
This was an hour after then -- Hime-chan was still flicking her fingers and playing around (is that fun?), and Aikawa-san had fallen asleep as she laid down -- and I stood up.
"Huh? Master, where're you going?"
"... bathroom."
"Alright. I'll go, too."
What the heck?
I motioned for Hime-chan to stop standing up, and explained, "I want to act separately from you two."
"Separately...?"
"Yeah. I apologize, but I have grown tired of playing detective."
I lightly shrugged my shoulders. And then, untying the sling Aikawa-san had created for me, I freed the damaged shoulder.
"As Aikawa-san said, it appears I cannot stand these situations when you don't know what's going to happen. It is a new discovery for me. Shiogi-chan said something like uncertainty breeds anxiety, but... maybe it is something similar. I do not mind vagueness but I do not like uncertainty. ... Indeed, I am a rather narrow-minded person. In any case, I cannot stand waiting here like this any more."
"But..." Hime-chan pursed her lips, and looked at me in an antagonizing way. "C, can't you warrior, Master?"
Way of the Warrior, suicide?
Can't you wait, she probably had meant to say.
"That's messed up. Don't you get that we're safe as long as we're next to Jun-san? We can get out of the school easily if we leave it to Jun-san. What's the point in messing around with a good situation?"
"I am not debating this."
"No, you'll debate this. If Master messes around, then Hime-chan and Jun-san's well-being is endangered. For as long as we're moving as a team, Master's one hand, one move, two states, forty-three prefectures directly affect Hime-chan's future."
I decided not to play the straightman because we were having a serious discussion.
"I've thought about that much. Hime-chan. It is better for me to not be here. As Hime-chan just said. Hime-chan may be an apprentice -- but I am a newbie that does not even reach that level. Negative pieces should be cut away."
"That's a dumb--"
"Indeed," I continued, forcibly shutting down Hime-chan's retort. "This may be nothing to Aikawa-san. Negativity of my mere level may be meaningless to Aikawa-san. But -- I just thought. No, I realized -- no, no, understood, perhaps. Being by Aikawa-san's side is safe. That is enough to make you even feel proud. Being by Mankind's Strongest makes you feel that way -- but that is wrong. I do not want to escape from the battlefield for such a petty reason."
A bloodied room. Splattered lumps of meat. The gathered parts of Origami Noa. Mankind's Strongest, sleeping on the floor silently without even letting forth the sounds of breathing. In such an environment, a defeated nineteen-year-old and a fugitive seventeen-year-old were engaging in an immature debate. How could you not call this ridiculousness ridiculous, and what would you describe as buffoonery if this was not buffoonery?
"Then -- that would make me a petty thief. Scum that lives simply by crawling around the ground. Aikawa-san is enormous, so she should be able to give me at least that much -- that is dirty, a parasite that has no feelings of sin or guilt. I have had a lot of things going on of late, so I had almost forgotten. What kind of person I was, and what sort of lifestyle I had pursued."
I will not provide anything to anyone.
Therefore, I will not receive anything from anyone.
I will reject anything and everything. That... was supposed to be the last shred of dignity I had.
"In this case, Aikawa-san's job is to rescue you... and it has nothing to do with me. Even though it has nothing to do with me, I am a bother instead. That is not good. I... do not want to have to repay that favor."
I do not have a will.
But I am obstinate.
"But, Master--"
"Stop calling me by that alias. I cannot become a friend of a person like Aikawa-san. I also have no reason to be called that by you."
I waved Hime-chan aside, who for a moment looked hurt, and headed toward the door. The lock was easy to open from the inside. But because the electronics for opening and closing the door had been destroyed, I had to move the door with brute strength.
Protected by Aikawa-san. Yet still not being a burden to Aikawa-san. Protect Hime-chan. Feel like you are protecting her, and become satisfied. And hold each others' hands. Friendly, cooperating.
Indeed, what a dream-like human relation.
Yet that was simply that, a dream.
Dreams are, after all, dreams.
"But, um... Master."
Stop, I said... what an over-familiar brat." I turned around, and placed a hand on Hime-chan's shoulder. Just a bit, I pushed -- and displayed rejection. "Don't expect me to be nice. Don't expect me to be friends. I find those things -- disgusting."
"-- aa"
Hime-chan took a step back at my words.
See, it is simple.
It was that simple for trust to be broken.
And along with it, fondness crumbled, frailly,
And I would become alone.
"I am bored of acting like friends. This is my escape, Hime-chan. Similar to yours. Of course, this may confuse the enemies -- so feel free to do what you want in the meantime. That is up to Hime-chan and Aikawa-san."
"Why, ... why, are you acting so distant?"
"Because we're strangers."
"But, Jun-san,"
"I do not want to be a burden on Aikawa Jun, I thought. Even if I am not worth even a shackle."
The truth was nothing that stoic, but rather just my stubbornness. From the result of the conflict between resignation and compromise.
Do you not know about me?
Do you not know how I feel?
Do you not understand me?
Hime-chan.
That is a truly wonderful thing.
Of course, Hime-chan was correct in this debate. I am wrong. I am wrong above and beyond whatever lay beyond the ceiling. But -- I was at my limits. For the wrong me to continue doing the right thing, I had had enough. I could not make excuses over cracking past the limiting line. And I had no intention of doing so to begin with.
Yeah, that is what it comes down to.
The User of Nonsense, even when it came to Aikawa Jun, rejected friendliness.
"Because, but--"
"So, byebye."
I closed the door without letting Hime-chan finished. Yes, leaving Aikawa-san aside, Hime-chan's slender arms and thin body would not be able to open this door. Even if Aikawa-san were to wake up later, as she had said herself, she would not bother helping me, as I had gone off on my own. Actually, she may not have even been sleeping this whole time. She could fake sleeping easily. She was so good at deceiving others, after all.
Similar to the way she brought me here.
"-- and what's amazing is that I can't bring myself to hate her..."
I probably liked Aikawa-san quite a bit. Although that is a thought, and far from a feeling.
"....."
Even so, despite having finally realized that I had been tricked, I was not kindly enough to sit around.
And then Hime-chan. Yukariki Ichihime.
When I thought about inadvertently dragging her into the mess -- my actions would make sense. It had just been a few hours since we had met, so I found my fondness for her ludicrous, but that was my thought. I did not want to think that I was simply doubling Hime-chan as that. In any case, I did not want to drag an irrelevant girl into my own game of confession.
"... so, this is the end of nonsense."
I had heard that the floor beneath housed the faculty room, so I tried to make as little noise as absolutely possible, and headed toward the emergency stairs we had used. Fortunately it seemed no one was around, and escaping from the faculty ward was simple. Now, where was this -- I had simply followed Aikawa-san and did not comprehend the layout of the place. I did not know where everything was, and I did not know what route we had taken to get here.
"... Oh, well."
I decided to mill about. ... and if possible, I hoped to run into Hagihara Shiogi-chan. Shiogi-chan, according to Aikawa-san, is similar to me. I did not dislike running into such people -- people whom are of the same type as I. I do not know why. Perhaps there is a silly part of me, that hopes that I could become friends with someone of the same type, that someone could understand me.
Visibility was bad. It seemed there was a lack of lighting -- of course, because schools are not designed to function at night. It seemed Sumiyuri Academy -- no, there was no reason to keep using such a name now -- Hanging High School did not have night activities. Or perhaps, there just was no need to differentiate between noon and night.
"... but, there really is no one..."
Although Aikawa-san had beaten down a number of them, they were not the type to give up at that. It was unthinkable that there would be some sort of curfew... and the faculty were likely not to remain observers forever.
Then -- I thought.
The suspect who killed the dean, Origami Noa -- although it was debatable whether such a being could be called a person -- the suspect, where had they gone? According to Aikawa-san and Hime-chan, this situation had come about due to the dean's orders. In that case, you could deduce that the dean was killed after giving the orders. And the scent of blood, the feel of meat, was not that old. At the very least, it had not been over a day.
Motive -- for this, there were enough to gather and toss in the can. Origami Noa's hobby was being hated by people, being despised by people, being begrudged by people, being cursed by people. ... A rather crazy person, she apparently was.
"Then a power struggle -- would be the most valid."
And then to place the blame on fugitive and her accomplices. It was quite a good strategy. The morale of the students would go up for taking out an enemy. And if there was any hope for us, it would be that the dean's death was not yet widely known.
Ahh. So that was why Aikawa-san was staying where she was. As I belated realized the reason, the familiar campus sight, the building with Grade 2 Class A was in front of me. It almost felt like it had been forever since I was here, though.
"Oh, right. Photo..."
I could care less about the blueprint now, but I realized that I had dropped the photo of Hime-chan while running about, too. I decided to look around for it. Not that it was any useful either -- but I could find nothing better to do. I could barely remember how to get back to the front gate from here, but I was not carefree enough to think there would be no traps there. And I had no intention of leaving the academy anyways. I just wanted to leave that room. From that uncomfortable room.
I said a lot to Hime-chan... but my true feeling probably was simply that I did not like being around Aikawa-san. That was all, a boring, petty pride. Not that pride is not petty to begin with.
"Yes... this is a rarity... that I am bothered by other people this much."
Perhaps that was how special Aikawa-san was. No, I felt like that was not the case. There is only one special person to me -- and that one person is not here. The person here was simply similar.
I entered the building, looked for stairs, and climbed. There were no lights. It was dark. But I felt like visibility was better than when I was outside. I felt like that may be a case of concentration. Anyways, where was Grade 2 Class A... if I use that as a starting point, I felt like I could find the photo. Or perhaps the enemies had already collected it?
While I looked around for Hime-chan's photo, I thought about the mystery of the dean's room again. There were two windows aside from the door, but they were both obviously locked. They were double-locked, and could not be manipulated from outside. And places that someone could hide, Aikawa-san had checked from the start... hmm.
Come to think of it, there was something strange. A factor. The factor of being a sealed room had meaning, as Aikawa-san had said. Was the meaning to frame us for the crime? But then one more factor... how about the dismemberment? What was the point of performing such an eerie feat as dangling a neck from the ceiling?
Dismemberment using a chainsaw... the act itself would not take much time, but I also felt like it was not worth the effort to do it for the sake of it. Was it dismemberment out of enmity, or perhaps a different purpose... I could not imagine that it was done just to dangle a head from the ceiling because this was the Hanging High School.
"Dismemberment..." Dismember, dissect, biotechnology, biology.
"... Reminds me of teacher."
Not that I wanted to remember.
Just as I had begun sliding into remembrance of my time as an ER Program student.
"Ssswaaayyyy..."
A silhouette appeared in front of me.
"... Ssswaaayyyy..."
No, that was a wrong form of expression. She was already in front of me, so dubbing that a silhouette was improper. I should clearly state person. However -- in the darkness, the eerie and strange, swaying girl -- I could not see her clearly in the darkness with my vision.
It was like she existed on a different dimension, as if she was blurred out, such was how vague her form looked.
"-- Stop."
And her movement stopped.
She wore a black sailor uniform to go with her short-cropped hair. Her uniform was cut up here and there as if she had been assaulted by a hoodlum, but it seemed to be her sense of fashion. And from her hands that stretched out from the sleeves of that uniform--
"-- Ahh. I'll introduce myself, for what it's worth, I'm -- Saijou Tamamo-chan. A freshman."
Eliminator 00 in her right hand. Griffon Hard Custom in her left hand.
Tamamo-chan was wielding them -- brusque, overly-dangerous large knives that did not suit the hands of a girl. Both knives were held with a backhand grip, and as if to display that this was a natural hold, she stood straight up and immobile and stared at me. A fogged, hollow existence, glazed eyes.
I screwed up, I thought honestly.
I did not expect blades to come out. I did not realize that this time it was this abnormal... The island that gathered geniuses and the serial killers were all normal compared to this. Just who could possibly keep up with this?
Or rather, this girl, from her clothing to her equipment, seemed to be asking for a straight-man, but I could not decide where to start.
"You know, it is already past school hours."
"That's not actually the case here-."
I whiffed.
But at least it seemed she could communicate normally, and Tamamo-chan narrowed her eyes and laughed. And then she began murmuring, "ssswaaayyyy... ssswaaayyyy," and shook her head lightly. Maybe she had a migraine, because she seemed strained a bit, as if she was tolerating some pain. Or perhaps she was just a bit anemic. She looked a bit sleepy, too. She seemed to notice my questioning gaze, as she said "ah" and straightened herself.
"Hmm? Ahh, this knife is just a hobby... don't worry about it."
"I, see..."
I discovered a lying girl.
"Ummm... right. I was looking for you guys... right. Huh? Weren't there three... of you? Am I the only one that can't see them? That's odd... glasses, glasses..."
"....."
Is this girl alright? In this case, this girl being alright directly related to my life or death, so I truly worried. It was like, cool and hip, or something, and she seemed like she was the type who could sprout wings on her back.
"Ahh. Umm..." she swayed and shook her head. "Oh well. I'll stab you twice or thrice and then think about it."
"You're mistaken, you know."
But she paid the upperclassman's kind pointer no heed, and crossed the two blades in front of her small breasts.
"Shing! ... eheheh."
Tamamo-chan loosened up a bit and made a faint smile, and then blushed. She was embarrassed, it seemed. But her embarrassed smile was reflecting off the blades and so it looked like nothing other than an object of terror.
She wielded a knife in both hands -- but that itself was not dangerous. After all, doing so restricts arm movement and makes it easier to read the attack pattern, and it obstructs defensive movements. For example in kendo only the best try their hand at double-wielding. But on the other hand that also means that if they are extremely proficient -- then they can use two blades at will.
In other words, all or nothing -- a newbie or a master. And in this Hanging High School, there should be no newbies.
"Tamamo-chan, umm--"
"I won't listen to pleas for mercy -- umm, because it's a pain," she said as she crept closer with her unstable footwork. "And, it's our first time meeting, so don't add chan to my name. ... I'll mince you to pieces."
Mince -- to pieces.
Like the dean?
Like the dean -- by Zig Zag?
"Wait -- question. Was this strategy planned out by Shiogi-chan?"
"Wrong... Shiogi-senpai looked like she was scheming something... but I suck at that stuff, so I just came over."
Eheh, Tamamo-chan grinned. Her smile was cute, but I would have preferred if she had come in a group. Did this academy not teach cooperation? Learn cooperativeness more, Tamamo-chan. Schools are places to learn cooperation, after all.
"So, Tamamo-chan, away... sssswa... aaa... yyyy!"
And then from a standing posture, she immediately jumped toward me. The left and right knives were aimed to intersect at my neck.
Crap, this girl, was truly honestly serious.
Of course I could not oppose her, so I turned around, and then ran away.
"Ahh-. Running's bad."
She mumbled and, still gripping the knives backhand, chased after me. I thought I could outrun her because she was smaller -- but I underestimated her. I am not a slow runner, but Tamamo-chan was just too fast. I felt like Kuchisake-Onna being chased by Hijiko-san. Shit, when I was able to grab Hime-chan and run from two, I just had a good matchup. In other words, the battlefield's level had gone up. She quickly closed ground, and suddenly, Tamamo-chan's Griffon was flung toward my head.
"Wa-- woah!"
I barely dodged it, in a stumbling manner. That was not a joke. That knife was clearly not designed for being thrown, but she threw it like a shuriken. What kind of arm strength did that girl have?
Or, rather, that her thin arms could wield those large knifes was in itself abnormal. Did this academy not exist in a reasonable plane?
And Tamamo-chan placed her hip over my back, as I had slid along the floor on my stomach, and placed the remaining knife, Eliminator to my throat. If she flicked her wrist to the side, my carotid artery would not end well.
"... What were you supposed to say here... checkmate? Nah, that's not it. You don't seem like a King. How about... high-flying knights are food for pawns?"
Am I a knight?
What a half-hearted choice.
"Then, I'm going to like, ask you questions... so try to answer them honestly, please. Not that I really care either way, but the more honest you are, the longer you live, is how it works."
Tamamo-chan seemed extremely tired as she spoke. Not so much like the act of talking was tiring, but more like the act of living itself was tiresome, that sort of slovenly attitude.
"Umm.... ssswaaayyyy. Overkilled Red and Yukariki-senpai... where are they? To tell you the truth, I've been looking for them for a while."
"... a question from me, first."
"Ehhh? Nah that's not how it works. I'm the one asking questions," Tamamo-chan puffed her cheeks. "Ahhh. But whatever. Special permission-. Because it's a pain."
It appeared Tamamo-chan was not fond of speaking. In a debate, she seemed the type to let the opponent win just so she would not have to speak. Being a pushover is not a good trait for a young girl, but in this case this was an opportunity for me.
"... Are you Zig Zag?"
"Huhh? What're you talking about, no."
Tamamo-chan shook her head, almost as if she was insulted.
Wrong... then. Then, if this was wrong.
"I guess you don't really get what's going on? You were dragged into this by the red person without knowing about the school or anything, I think? Not knowing Zig Zag... wouldn't you look into that beforehand, ask."
She stopped talking, perhaps because she had grown tired from speaking. And then she mumbled, "ssswaaayyyy," and then finished, "around beforehand?"
"Unfortunately, it is a principle of mine to not step into dangerous matters."
"Huh. Then, a question from me... what's your goal?"
I actually thought that she was going to ask me again about Hime-chan and Aikawa-san, so Tamamo-chan's question caught me off-guard.
"Goal... that is."
"It's not to save Yukariki-senpai is it. It's not helping Overkilled Red, either. ... um, you know. Me, and Hagihara-senpai that you mentioned earlier, we're all doing this for a reason."
"....."
"But do you have a purpose to match that? Do you have enough of a purpose, that you can bring it to our faces, while we do this in this school? If you do, tell me."
"... Tamamo-chan."
"But to just reject it, calling it abnormal or unrealistic, that's cheap. Please don't deny everyone else's existence that easily," Tamamo-chan said, without any emotion behind her words. "Or maybe, you just love your own normalcy and valuation that much?"
That, to me.
This academy is messed up -- but did I have enough to reject that? Did I have something not messed up?
"Ahh, whatever, too much of a pain."
Tamamo-chan gripped the knife again, in a normal way.
"Somehow or other, die, please."
The blade and my flesh created friction--
"---!"
Death.
I felt terribly calm. In a terribly calm way, I felt disheartened. Disappointed. That I would die this easily, in this situation... I had always thought that I would be killed in a more, unbelievable, or a tremendous tragedy of the ages, or something. But to be killed in such a way, like a side character, like dying by being crushed under a crumbling building -- no.
In a way, that in turn may simply be more fitting. The end of this diminutive insect. For a moment I thought of reflecting on my boring life, but even that thought was brutally dissipated, and--
Kunagisa Tomo. Only Kunagisa Tomo remained in my thoughts.
Ahh, Tomo, I wish I could see you...
Tomo, I wish I could apologize to you.
"-----"
Just then, I heard footsteps echoing down the hall.
Quick footsteps, like someone running.
"...-- Master--...Master-!"
Along with that shout.
Tamamo-chan was surprised, recoiling, and looked in that direction.
"Yukariki, senpa--"
Her hand -- was separated from the blade.
I could not even look at Hime-chan to confirm that she was there, as I pushed Tamamo-chan off with my back and arm strength, and as I turned around I struck her in the stomach with my knee. Girls, younger, I did not have enough composure to think about that.
Tamamo-chan was flung right into the wall of the hallway -- and lost consciousness. No, she was the type that lacked consciousness even when she was conscious, so maybe that was a bad way to express it, but in any case, she stopped moving.
I placed a hand to my neck -- it was bleeding.
Specifically, by the skin of my neck.
"Master!" from behind, that line. "I finally caught up!"
"..... Hime-chan," I turned around, and then finally, saw Hime-chan. "Why are you here?"
"Ah, sorry," Hime-chan answered in between gasps. "Hime-chan couldn't open that door, so I was a bit late. And I never did get that door to open, so I came through the ventilation shafts. That place on the ceiling with the spinning fan thing. You can remove that from the inside. Ufufu, it's probably impossible for Master, but Hime-chan's small, so I was able to escape that way."
I was not asking about her struggles. Was there a ventilator to begin with? Maybe the impact of the dangling neck was too big for me to notice. Careless. Or rather, more importantly.
"... Aikawa-san? Is not with you?"
"Uhh," Hime-chan groaned like an animal. "I woke up Jun-san right after that, but. Let people who want to do what they want do what they want, she said, and then she didn't move anymore. She wouldn't even open the door for me. So I came by myself."
"Came by myself, but Hime-chan..."
"Master is wrong."
She said, bluntly.
She said bluntly, and looked at me straight on.
"You talked me down before, but, you were wrong. Not being able to be together because you don't want to drag them down is just cowardice."
"Harsh. But I will not refute that. Cowardly cowardice indeed. It is still preferable to ending up at a conclusion I do not understand. It is healthier. I have said it often and I say again that I am only thinking of fleeing. From enemies, and from friends."
What irony. I butted heads with that fortune-teller with a horrible personality, yet I sought more than anything else a clear vision of the future.
"Being able to think about later is proof of composure!" Hime-chan yelled, for some reason, for some reason that I truly did not understand, with anger. "If you're frantically trying to live now, then you shouldn't have the time to think about that! Master, maybe it's wrong to be coming from me, but aren't you just being lazy?"
"... You really are talking off now, Hime-chan."
I could tell my voice was rising.
"What -- do you understand about me? What do you understand about a person that must be lazy?"
"At the very least I understand that you're a user of nonsense that keeps making excuses. Master, you know as well as I do, that you're just afraid of being by Jun-san," Hime-chan said with a challenging, taunting tone. There was a bit of a malice, a bit that included wanting to push me down. "You're just discomforted by being around an enormous existence like Jun-san, because it makes you feel like you're puny."
"Hey -- wait. I do not see why you have to go that far. I--"
She struck me where it hurt, so I was almost at the point of arguing with her. I restrained myself at the very last moment, but it was truly at the very last moment. If Hime-chan was not not similar to that, there probably would have been nothing stopping me.
For example, the unchanging, unending, unbreaking Dead Blue. For example, the Seven Fools that were the closest to solving the world. For example, the artist that flouted discrimination and disdain. For example, the psychic that could only see that which could not be seen.
And then -- mankind's strongest contractor.
"-- What is wrong with that?"
One day, to be thought of as useless.
Somewhere, to be realized as being puny.
What was wrong with being afraid of being tossed by the roadside?
What was wrong with being afraid of being betrayed?
"Trust is sad. Trust is very sad. People live alone. The more you trust, the greater the force of betrayal. You break, you crumble, and you can never be back again."
"Even so, being alone is lonely."
"Even so, I will live alone. If you are to tell me that I cannot live alone, then I would rather die. To begin with, if you are gathering because you are lonely, then the more you find people you can trust, the more that person is just a lonesome person. Humans that live alone are pitiful and poor and grotesque and isolated -- and above all respectable."
Like her, who was strangled.
"To generalize that as being lonely is blasphemous."
"Then Master, you're not lonely?"
Hime-chan said.
"Are you alone because you're not lonely?"
"....."
"Hime-chan was always lonely."
Ahh -- really.
Do not look at me with such eyes.
True. Pure. Natural. Fondness. Caring. Truth.
Now -- to me. To this me.
It is too late to atone for my sins, do you not understand?
I want to flee. I want to flee. I want to flee.
Flee. Desert. Evade. Scram.
Yes, like that time --
"-- How many times do you want to make me repeat myself."
It was such nonsense -- that I almost wanted to laugh. Even though I did not know how to smile.
Ahh... I see.
Hime-chan was not like that.
She was like the old that.
That was why I was shaken up by her.
That was why I wanted to leave the dean's room.
"What... nonsense."
Yet. It appeared I was still human, capable of not making the same error twice.
"Huh... --Master?"
"... No. I lose, is what I said. You are right, it is as Hime-chan says. At the very least, this was not the time or place to be selfish. Sorry, sorry. This debate is my loss... is Aikawa-san still in the dean's room?"
"Ah, y- yes!"
Seeing me acquiesce, Hime-chan's expression brightened. As if truly happy, such was her smile. The one being flashed it would hesitate, such was her defenseless smile. Indeed -- guilt, had been locked away long ago, that was supposed to be why I abandoned it.
Yet, why, like this.
Why, like this, was I so stubborn? Even though if I could truly reject everything, I would be much happier.
Even though if I could commit suicide, that would be the best.
"Ah, but because we're talking about Jun-san, maybe she got angry and left on her own..."
"Ahh... that sounds plausible."
"Mor eimportantly, this girl."
Hime-chan carefully approached the unconscious Tamamo-chan.
"Yeah. She was a pretty dangerous girl. Ah, I had not thanked you yet. Hime-chan's arrival caused her to slip up."
"You're welcome," she said, as she dug through Tamamo-chan's uniform. What was she doing? I hoped it was not a strange hobby. "... Ah. She did have a wireless radio."
It was similar... to a cell phone, but it had very few buttons. It seemed like a wireless device for communicating among friends. It was palm-sized and seemed convenient for use... but so what?
"So basically, Saijou-chan, before she lost consciousness... she may have communicated with Hagihara-san or someone."
"That is bad..."
In other words, this place was no longer safe. However, the stairs were also dangerous for going to the level below. We may run straight into them. Bad. We had been cornered to an extent... we were not mice in a bag yet, but we may be approaching a pouch.
Hime-chan began pondering, "Hmmmm," and then after a while, "Oh well, it can't be helped, it's time for the secret weapon," and then she opened the pouchette that had been hanging from her shoulder.
"You know, that had been bothering, what is inside that pouchette?"
"Stuff. The Seven Tools of the Hanging High School. Not that I have seven things inside."
And then Hime-chan pulled out a few things that looked like reels. They were somewhat large for usage in sewing, but they were also definitely not for fishing. They were packed to the brim with string. No... could you call them string...?
"What is that...?"
"Lines. Well, I guess to be specific you could call it synthetic fiber or wire or string or something." Hime-chan said as she pulled out reels one after another from her pouchette. "I have platinum and titan wires. They're all scientifically enhanced to the best science has to offer now. This one's multi-purpose. I have a bunch, like Kevlar and aramid and carbon."
I had only heard of Kevlar. Material for bullet-proof vets, if I remembered correctly. I do not know if you could really call that string, considering how different its strength was.
"Other than that, it's used for space exploration and military stuff, it has a pretty wide scope of use."
Said Hime-chan, as she opened the hallway window, and then opened a window in the opposing classroom, and then began tying strings here and there. While they looked compact on the reel, each strand was actually extremely thin, and because of the dim visibility I could not see them without paying enormous attention. They were like spider silk, such that I felt like they would break just by touching them. I was about to touch one to test, but Hime-chan stopped me, saying, "Ah, you shouldn't."
"If you touch it the wrong way your finger'll get cut off."
I was the one that would be cut.
"Hmm... ah, this one is piano string. There are a lot of types of string. ... So, Hime-chan, what are you doing with this?"
"I'm making a rope. The window sill isn't enough to support both of our weight, so right now, I'm doing some calculating to make sure I get enough to support our weight."
"... wait. That means..." I stopped mid-sentence. "You want to rappel down to the first floor?"
"Right right yes."
"... Joke?"
"It's alllllllllright!" she stretched out the word three times longer than it needed to be, and stuck out her chest. "Master, just act like you've been tricked by Hime-chan and give up!"
"That would just be being tricked..."
I said once,
"That would just be being tricked!"
I said twice.
I should have run.
I thought, a little bit honestly. Shogi idiom - knights can jump over other pieces and get deep into enemy territory, but if you recklessly progress them they'll become easy fodder for pawns