New Times, New Hell Chapter 73 - Needlepoint-Throated Hungry Ghost

Chapter 73 - Needlepoint-Throated Hungry Ghost

After resolving the problems with app promotion at the Minan reincarnation point, Yu Zhengdu went to ask Shang Que for some time off. He said, “Boss, I want to submit a request to head back to the company two days later than scheduled.”
Shang Que furrowed his brows. “Is something wrong?”
Yu Zhengdu: “One of my classmates in Minan is getting married. He’s invited me to attend the wedding.”
It turned out that one of the students in their class was a Minan native. The location of his wedding reception was his hometown. Because it was quite far from Fu City, he hadn’t invited his university classmates to attend. Originally, he had been planning on treating his classmates to a meal back in Fu City to make up for this.
But while chatting in the group chat a few days ago, that classmate unintentionally discovered that Yu Zhengdu happened to coincidentally be on a business trip and was in Minan. Thus, he sent the other an invitation. Yu Zhengdu thought that since he was here anyways, it wouldn’t be right not to attend. Thus, after resolving all the issues on hand, he came to ask Shang Que for some time off.
When Shang Que heard this, he didn’t immediately respond. Instead, he scanned Yu Zhengdu with his peripheral vision. For some reason, his tone seemed slightly insinuating, “Your classmate is getting married really early.”
“He’s been with his girlfriend since college. They’ve been in a relationship for several years and had originally been planning to get married after graduation,” Yu Zhengdu’s tone was even more insinuating than Shang Que’s. “Really makes people feel jealous and envious.”
Shang Que’s tone was probing, “Are you very jealous?”
“I’m obviously envious,” Yu Zhengdu sourly said. “How shameful it is to be a single programmer. Especially since I’m a rather handsome programmer. It’s really very easy to be accidentally harmed.”
Shang Que was confused, “Accidentally harmed in what way?”
“Ey, when my classmate sent me the invitation, he said that he had left two spots for me. He told me to bring a significant other,” Yu Zhengdu’s tone was pissed. “Though he was being unintentional, as a sensitive single dog, I felt that I had been mocked. I’m here on a business trip. Who casually brings their significant other along during business trips? I could bring a boss along, though.”
Shang Que’s gaze drifted away. “Since you want to bring me along, then I’ll go.”
Yu Zhengdu hadn’t even finished complaining when he heard Shang Que speak. He became bewildered. “……Huh?”
He had just made to ask Boss why his comprehension abilities were so twisted when he heard Shang Que mutter to himself, “Fortunately, my schedule for the next two days isn’t too packed. I should be able to squeeze out some time and accompany you to the wedding reception.”
He looked towards Yu Zhengdu, expression curious. “I vaguely recall that it’s required to bring red envelopes along when attending weddings in the mortal realm. If we go together, do we need to give one red envelope or two?”
Yu Zhengdu: “……”
Boss had already scheduled everything clearly. If Yu Zhengdu were to reject him now, he might start researching what recipes the other could be made into in the next life.
Yu Zhengdu smiled slightly. “One’s enough. I’ll give it.”
Coincidentally, that classmate who was getting married started pestering him in the class chat:
Jia Yihua:【Yu Zhengdu, are you sure you can come to the wedding? Are you coming by yourself or are you bringing a significant other?】
Zhang Qingqing:【???? What gossip have I missed out on? Zhengdu has a significant other?】
Jia Yihua:【Just asking theoretically.】
Classmate A:【Be clear with your words. You scared me to death. I almost started crying for those little shimeis who haven’t given up yet】
Classmate B:【You only thought of the shimeis. What about Zhengdu’s fifty CP’s?!】
Yu Zhengdu:【……】
Yu Zhengdu:【I’ll be bringing a guest, but not my significant other. My guest is my boss】
Classmates:【…………………………】
Classmates:【????????】
Zhang Qingqing:【Did I read that right? Zhengdu is going to bring his boss to attend Yihua’s wedding?】
Zhu Yan:【Is there something wrong with my comprehension abilities? Zhengdu’s boss = his significant other? Is that what you mean?】
Yu Zhengdu:【= = What are you guys thinking. It’s just that my boss happens to be in Minan too. He’s also free, so said he would tag along is all】
Zhu Yan:【Emmmmm, I’m extremely, extraordinarily confident that even if my boss was so bored that he was swatting flies in his home, he wouldn’t attend a wedding with me】
Classmate A:【Speaking of, I remember that there are still CP posts about Zhengdu and his boss on our school’s forum】
Classmate B:【Not even. They’re already considered an official couple on Weibo. CEO x senior, the perfect CP. Haven’t you guys gone to CEO’s Weibo to shout “it’s real” in the comments?】
Zhang Qingqing:【Raised hand.jpg, I admit it, I have!】
Yu Zhengdu:&#k3010;&#k2026;&#k2026;You guys dare to secretly ship me behind my back??&#k3011;
Classmate A:&#k3010;Bullshit. We’re clearly shipping you to your face&#k3011;
Classmate B:&#k3010;Yu Zhengdu, so, right now, you need to tell us. Is our ship canon?&#k3011;
Yu Zhengdu:&#k3010;&#k2026;&#k2026;0.0 You guys are overthinking things!&#k3011;
Zhang Qingqing:&#k3010;How could this be us overthinking things? Clearly CEO has admitted it before too!&#k3011;
Yu Zhengdu:【What?】
Zhang Qingqing:【Screenshot.jpg】
Yu Zhengdu clicked open the screenshot. It turned out that this was of a comment under Shang Que’s Weibo:【CEO, post your boyfriend’s pictures too】
Under this was Shang Que’s reply: From Today On I Will Be A European God: No
Zhang Qingqing:【See, CEO has tacitly acknowledged the title of “boyfriend”. Tsk tsk tsk】
Yu Zhengdu: “……”
Yu Zhengdu turned to look at Shang Que. He was in a strange mood. Coincidentally, Shang Que happened to look over too. He asked, “You don’t have red envelopes on you, right? Should we go buy some?”
Yu Zhengdu: “……”
He didn’t know if he had been affected by his classmates, but right now, he seemed to be getting the feeling that Boss was being too enthusiastic?
However, he honestly couldn’t ask the question out loud. After all, Boss had never acted like he was pursuing him? Wouldn’t it be too stupid if he took the initiative to ask about this?
Yu Zhengdu thought about it and decided that he needed to observe a bit more first. Thus, he nodded. “Then let’s head out and buy red envelopes now. We can also walk around.”
This was Yu Zhengdu’s first time in Minan. He decided that he could squeeze some time out to look around, so headed to the downtown walking street with Shang Que.
While walking, Yu Zhengdu tentatively asked Shang Que, “Speaking of, Boss, you’ve lived for so long. Have you ever had a relationship?”
“You want to know about this?” Shang Que glanced at Yu Zhengdu out of his periphery. His tone was a bit meaningful.
Yu Zhengdu: “……We’re making small talk, right?”
Shang Que quieted for a moment before slowly starting, “In the past, there were several goddesses and female ghosts within the three realms who pursued me……”
Yu Zhengdu: “So you……?”
Shang Que gave him a gaze that read don’t worry. “I didn’t accept any of their pursuits.”
Yu Zhengdu: Failed once again at reading Boss’s gaze!
Shang Que paused. As if with great determination, he added, “But now, I could consider……”
Before he finished speaking, he saw Yu Zhengdu point across the street. “There’s a stationary store there. They should sell packs of red envelopes. Stand here and wait for me. I’ll come back after buying one.”
Yu Zhengdu had already disappeared before Shang Que could react. He agilely squeezed through the crowd and made his way to the other side of the street. In only an instant, his figure was already gone.
Shang Que: “……Oh.”
Yu Zhengdu bought a pack of red envelopes from the stationary store and walked out. He was about to run back to the other side of the street when he turned around and noticed that there was a pretty popular local milk tea store next to him. He thought about it and walked into the store instead. After taking a picture of the menu, he sent it to Shang Que.
Yu Zhengdu:【Boss, what do you want to drink?】
Shang Que had originally been daydreaming. After suddenly receiving this message from Yu Zhengdu, his eyes unconsciously became filled with joy.
My Broke-ass Boss:【This, this, and this.】
Yu Zhengdu:【……You want three cups?】
My Broke-ass Boss:【Un, extra sugar, extra pearls.】
Yu Zhengdu:【……Okay】
The milk tea store was pretty crowded. Yu Zhengdu waited a long time before walking out with four cups of milk tea. Because he was holding too much stuff, he needed to switch hands. As soon as he finished doing so, someone tapped his shoulder from behind.
“Friend, you’ve dropped something,” a low voice said.
Yu Zhengdu turned around, only to see a man wearing sunglasses and a mask hand over a pack of red envelopes.
“Oh oh, thank you.” While speaking, Yu Zhengdu grabbed the pack of red envelopes. However, as soon as he took two steps forward, he suddenly realized that something was wrong. The pack of red envelopes he had bought had originally all been wrapped in clear plastic. Yet, there was one outside of the pack in the pile the stranger had just handed him.
Yu Zhengdu felt slightly suspicious and raised the pack of red envelopes closer to observe them more clearly. The pack was open. He brushed it and a yellow piece of paper slowly floated out of it.
That paper was very thin and light. He couldn’t tell what material it was made of, but there were strange designs drawn on the surface with red ink.
Yu Zhengdu furrowed his brows. He bent over and leaned down to get a better look at that yellow paper. The designs on it were slightly familiar, almost as if he had seen them somewhere before. He scooted closer and closer. Finally, after great difficulty, he could almost clearly discern the designs. At this moment, though, that same, low voice sounded out from behind him once more. “Yu Zhengdu.”
“Who are you?” Yu Zhengdu reflexively turned around, just in time to see the man from before. He was still wearing the mask, but had taken the sunglasses off. His exposed eyes were as sharp as an eagle’s. They were coldly focused on him.
Yu Zhengdu’s heart suddenly skipped a beat.
In that instant, he finally remembered. That yellow piece of paper was clearly the guiding talisman that Shang Que had told him about following Fan Li’s death replacement incident.
His expression darkened. He stared at the person before him and said lowly, “Jiang.”
The other revealed the hint of a smile. “You’re pretty smart.”
Yu Zhengdu kept his gaze locked on the other. He knew that he hadn’t been smart enough.
Jiang was a ghost.
Just now, he had been a ghost, calling a spirit.
And Yu Zhengdu, who had grabbed the guiding talisman, had just so happened to instinctively reply to his call.
When Yu Zhengdu regained consciousness, he discovered that he was standing in the middle of the desolate wilderness.
The night was dark. The moon was half-covered by dark clouds, revealing only a hazy white light. He turned around to observe his surroundings and noticed that his left was an endless expanse of emptiness. His right was a dark and shadowy forest. Starlight and moonlight slightly dappled through the trees; they were a ghostly blue or a ghastly white. Looking at them made one shiver with cold.
A small river cut through the forest, travelling through the wilderness and flowing into the distance. That water was deep and dark. If one didn’t listen carefully, they would barely be able to hear the sounds of water.
Yu Zhengdu stood there for a bit. His brain finally, slowly started clearing up. The scene from prior to losing consciousness emerged in his mind.
Guiding talisman, ghost calling a spirit.
So now, he should be a spirit.
He looked down at himself and discovered that he didn’t look any different than he had in life. He was even still holding the four cups of milk tea in his hands.
Yu Zhengdu: “……”
Having worked at Luofeng for so long, he naturally knew that after death, human spirits would look exactly the same as they had in life. From clothing to posture to appliances, there were no differences. Otherwise, the Underworld would probably be filled with naked ghosts floating everywhere. However, he honestly hadn’t thought that even the milk teas he had been holding would be able to transform into spirits with him.
He thought about it, then pulled out his phone from his pocket. The phone right now was the Underworld version. He wanted to call Shang Que, but when he looked at the screen, he noticed that it only had 50% battery left. There was also no signal at all.
Yu Zhengdu sighed, unsurprised. It was easy to tell from the surroundings alone that this was clearly an undeveloped, uninhabited area. Only, he didn’t know where this was.
To his left, was a vast wilderness. He couldn’t see where it ended. There would be no purpose in walking toward it either. To his right, was a forest that looked slightly dangerous. In all honesty, if he had a choice, he definitely wouldn’t choose to enter.
But right now, he didn’t have a choice. He couldn’t just keep waiting in place.
Yu Zhengdu pondered a bit before slowly turning around. While carrying the four cups of milk tea, he trekked along the side of the little black river, slowly walking into the forest.
Unexpectedly, the forest wasn’t as dark as it looked from outside. There were faint fires dotting the branches. They barely managed to provide enough light to see the forest.
Rather strangely, though those fires produced light, they didn’t produce any heat. They also didn’t seem to be burning the branches at all.
Yu Zhengdu very quickly reached a conclusion: these were most likely the legendary ghostly fires.
And a forest that possessed a large quantity of ghostly fires meant that this was most likely not a simple undeveloped, uninhibited area.
Yu Zhengdu’s brain worked quickly. After calling his spirit, why hadn’t that Jiang locked him up? Why had he left him here instead?
Or, had Jiang put all the spirits of the other people he had tricked into finding death replacements, then performed ghost calling a spirit on, here too?
Prior to this, Shang Que had once said that after successfully gaining a death replacement, those people who had found death replacements would be able to escape reincarnation. And, this place could be considered far from the mortal realm but not quite at the Underworld yet. If Jiang truly brought those spirits here, they truly would be undiscoverable by gods and ghosts alike.
But what should he do now? Could Shang Que find him? Could he still go back?
Yu Zhengdu was in the middle of blanking out when suddenly, a loud sound of “hua——” erupted from nearby. Shortly after, it was followed by the sounds of waves crashing. This scared him greatly.
Yu Zhengdu’s feet almost slipped out from under him. He hurriedly took two steps forward and looked into the river.
Only to see the dark, black river suddenly become chaotic. Black water rose from the river and sprayed into the air.
In the black waves, a large, black shadow the size of a small mountain jumped out from the river. Then, with an enormous thud, it landed on the shore. This caused the dirt under Yu Zhengdu’s feet to vibrate too.
Yu Zhengdu clenched his hands tightly into fists. His entire heart had practically already risen into his throat. He stared straight at the enormous black shadow before his eyes, preparing to run away at the first sign of danger.
……If he could.
Only to see that black shadow slowly lift its head. Its head was very big. With the faint light from the ghostly fires surrounding them, Yu Zhengdu could only see its strangely large eyes.
The other was looking at him too.
Yu Zhengdu silently took a step back, preparing to run.
And then, he heard the other open his mouth to say, “Do you have food?”
That voice was shrill and thin. It sounded like it had been squeezed out of a tiny hole with great difficulty.
Yu Zhengdu: “……?”
In his hesitation, the black shadow slowly approached. Yu Zhengdu could finally clearly see his appearance.
Only to see that he was covered in blue skin with a large and fat belly. Like a small hill, his large body was topped by a similarly large head, as well as equally frighteningly large facial features.
His gigantic eyes slowly lowered their gaze. Finally, they fell directly on the milk tea in Yu Zhengdu’s hands. He used his thin and shrill voice to say, “I smell it. The smell of food. The smell of delicious food.”
Now, Yu Zhengdu could finally confirm that this strange ghost creature didn’t have intentions of attacking him. To be more accurate, what the creature was truly interested in was the milk tea in his hands, not him.
Yu Zhengdu thought about it, then slowly held up the milk tea. He said, “If you want it, I can give this to you.”
Unexpectedly, as soon as he spoke, the other suddenly started wailing. “What use is there if you give it to me! I can’t eat it anyways!”
Black tears streamed out of his huge, round eyes. If not for the fact that his physical appearance was too terrifying, he would truly seem very pitiful.
Yu Zhengdu didn’t know how he had offended the other. He couldn’t help worrying that the other would attack him in embarrassment. He hurriedly asked, “Why not?”
“Look at my throat!” That ghost creature angrily opened his big mouth and leaned over. He pointed at his own throat and said, “Needlepoint-Throated Hungry Ghost, understand? My throat is as big as a needlepoint. How am I supposed to eat anything?!”
Yu Zhengdu: “……”
Only to see that his throat was extremely, extremely small. So small that it was practically invisible. This was maybe the reason why his voice was so strange.
Yu Zhengdu stared at that needle-like throat for a long time. Then, he looked down at the size of his own body and exhaled a long sigh of relief. “Now I can rest at ease. You probably shouldn’t be capable of eating me.”
Needlepoint-Throated Hungry Ghost: “……”
The author has something to say:
Shang Que: Where’s my milk tea? Wait no. Where’s my boyfriend?
Needlepoint-Throated Hungry Ghost: Are you even a human?!
Yu Zhengdu: Not anymore ┓( ′∀` )┏