Chapter 1724 Let This Be...
Fear wasn't something that Leonel could ever remember feeling, or at the very least, any memories of when he was were completely unimportant because he had likely been too young for it to matter. Even when the Metamorphosis descended onto Earth and he was thrust into life and death situations almost immediately, he had never really wavered in such a way.
He could remember his first entry into the Mayan Tomb quite clearly, and although he had felt apprehension, fear wasn't really at the forefront of his thoughts. In fact, the boldest emotion he remembered feeling from that time was guilt due to the lives he had taken.
Even back then, he was calm and cool under pressure, able to use his smarts to get him out of situations he otherwise had no business getting out of. By the end of those few days, he had become a war machine, killing with every step and using those olden guns as though they were pistols.
Looking back now, Leonel was much calmer about the matter and didn't feel the same fluctuations, but he could still remember it all clearly.
Just days after that he entered wore torn France and battled alongside some of the bravest men in history without feeling inadequate, and not much longer after that he battled against an entire Fort on his own with nothing more than a cold expression.
In fact, now that Leonel thought about it, the greatest instance of fear he had experienced ever since entering the Dimensional Verse wasn't related to himself at all, but was rather Aina's. He could still remember how she shivered in the face of the Puppet Master when she lost control of her body.
But now, Leonel was feeling so much fear that his breathing hurried, his skin turned a pasty white color, and he was completely drenched in sweat.
Every step forward made him feel as though he was suffering the worst kind of torture. In reality, the only thing keeping him going was his own stubbornness.
After a while, his smile faded and he became quite a bit angry. There was no doubt that this tablet was tweaking and pulling at the strings of his mind as he pleased.
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Every time he completed a calculation for a leap, he was absolutely certain of how far he had to jump, he would even see it through the whole way, however even so the fear would come in stronger and stronger waves. The only way for this to be happening is for this to go beyond just illusions, the Emperor's Might tablet was directly influencing his soul.
What pissed Leonel off was that he didn't seem to have a way to stop it.
In this world, he was nothing more than a mortal. He could only jump and leap just the same way anyone else of the Third Dimension would need to. He had no access to his Forces and all he could do was rely on his Ability Index and innate calculative abilities.
BANG!
Leonel nearly stumbled and fell, heaving in deep gasps. His jaw was steeled and his gaze was a blazing red.
He was convinced. This fear wasn't his own, it was just a fear that this tablet was forcing him to feel, but it was all too real, all too tangible, all too indistinguishable from what true fear should feel like.
Gritting his teeth, Leonel jumped again.
The rush of fear came, even though his momentum was perfect, even though his arc in the air didn't falter, even though the platform appeared right beneath his feet as it always did and he landed firmly.
Leonel looked back and saw all the platforms he had come from. He felt like he was really nearing some sort of psychological limit, but he had only climbed up nine stairs, while up ahead, there looked to be an infinite more to go.
'Damned tablet.'
Leonel grit his teeth so hard they nearly cracked.
He bent his knees once more, jumping forward.
The rush came again, the onslaught of irrational fear. He imagined that this would be what people who feared heights would feel like if they stood on a glass floor at the top of a sky scraper. It was completely irrational, you knew that the glass floor could hold up a hundred times your weight easily, and yet that fear would still come in waves.
Every time he leapt up, that fear would come again even stronger than the last time. It was relentless.
If Leonel felt that he had one weakness, it was probably his will power. Will power was something that you honed through hardship, you couldn't just be born with it.
With how easy Leonel's life had been, with how much talent he had, with how much confidence he had in himself, how could his will power be great? Often times, he relied on emotion to give himself the illusion of will power, but he never really proved himself in this regard.
He could still remember that day, back when he was still in the Third Dimension and trying to awaken his Metal Synergy Lineage Factor for the first time.
Compared to the pain that he had experienced since then, in battles with his life on the line, in practicing heart rending methods, in being eaten alive, that pain was child's play.
And yet, back then, it had hurt him so much that he almost gave up entirely, he had been just a small moment from doing so.
Despite the fact that he had gone through much worse since then, Leonel couldn't say that his will power was suddenly amazing, he would be lying to himself.
Today, he felt that this was only being affirmed. He had only moved up ten stairs of what must have been tens of thousands, and yet his mind already wanted to give way.
Leonel grit his teeth, his gaze blazing.
He was unwilling.
Since he hadn't experienced hardship before, let this be his hardship.