Chapter 682 Empress Dowager's Message
Li Rui looked at Xi Ying in silence. She tried to comprehend what exactly he meant by those words. Why does he think that he will lose her in this fight?
"Ying…"
She whispered trying to express her confusion and Xi Ying started to speak.
"That day…when I came back from the Imperial Palace and An Ju told me about the attack from Youxio on Xi Manor…I had wanted to do nothing but hit myself. Even after knowing that you were not safe in Manor without shadow guards, I called them to the Imperial Palace. That was so stupid of me. Even now, at every moment, I couldn't help but fear what could have happened if you didn't know how to defend yourself. Even if you can defend yourself, you should not have felt the need to do that, Rui."
Xi Ying's eyes were filled with tears.
He caressed her cheek with his finger gently as if he was trying to apologize indirectly.
"You are pregnant with our child. Both of us are responsible for him…to protect him. But what did I do? I put yours as well as our child's life in danger by leaving only An Ju to protect you. Not only that, but I also left that snake An San in Xi Manor."
Xi Ying's eyes shone with coldness when he whispered An San's name.
On the other hand, Li Rui who was looking at Xi Ying silently felt a little helpless. They had already talked about it and she had thought that he was no longer thinking about this but she had been very wrong.
"Ying….you also needed them."
She tried to explain.
However, Xi Ying seemed to be full of self-blame at this moment and he contradicted her immediately.
"But not more than you, Rui."
He thought that Zhao Wang Lei would get scared by his threats. The threat that he had given to him that day in the study room.
He had clearly said that if anything happened to his wife and child then he would destroy the whole Imperial Clan.
However, Zhao Wang Lei took him very lightly.
That was why Xi Ying brought up this matter in the Imperial Court. Though Zhao Wang Lei had already asked Minister Xin to investigate both matters, he wanted to see how Zhao Wang Lei would try to divert the investigation.
However, amidst all this, he himself couldn't escape the blame he had on his head.
It was snake's nature to bite but it was in one's own hands to protect himself and his loved ones from it. And he couldn't do his job properly.
Xi Ying came out of his trance when he felt Li Rui's hand on his cheek.
He looked at her with eyes that still had a little bit of moisture.
"Ying…"
Li Rui whispered as if she was speaking to a child. At this moment, Xi Ying looked no less than a child who was lost and didn't know what he was doing.
"You have seen Xi Ling trying to learn words, right? He can write very nicely but he still pronounces a few words wrong."
Xi Ying frowned in confusion wondering why she was bringing their son in this matter.
But he still heard her with all the attention.
"When he pronounces any word wrong, do you ask him to stop speaking at all or do you try to make him speak that word a few more times until he would learn to pronounce it rightly."
The frown on Xi Ying's forehead vanished as he understood what Li Rui was trying to do. But he shook his head and tried to speak
"It is not the same thing, Rui…"
"I know."
Li Rui said interrupting him amidst whatever he was going to say.
"It is not the same thing. But doing a few mistakes is nothing that a person doesn't do. I accept that you were at fault. You also accept that you were at fault. Both of us can learn from it. Maybe it was also necessary to wake up. Both of us will stay guarded against any such circumstances in the future…for our family, for our children."
Xi Ying had a thoughtful expression on his face.
Li Rui sighed in relief seeing that he was at least thinking about whatever she was saying.
"He is the Emperor. You can't really expect that you can control his each and every action. In the end, even if just for the name, he is still the one who rules this land and that Imperial Palace. His one word, and we can be declared traitors doing treason against the country. So we need to tread very carefully."
"You called the shadow guards because you wanted to reduce his power by making the Empress's influence weak who could have become a great threat even if she was against her own husband who we wants to kill. You called them because you wanted to fight for me in the Imperial Court. Your intentions were never wrong. You just wanted to do something for me that I couldn't do, Ying."
"How can I ever blame you in all this, Ying. I am in constant danger. One can't really stay guarded for every moment of his life. I can assure you of that. I have lived my life like this. If I will stay on guard at every moment, I will always stay fearful, cowardly and that kind of life is not what I want."
"Ying…"
Li Rui wanted to say much more but at this moment, there was a knock on the door.
Xi Ying frowned deeply as he looked towards the door.
From outside, An Si's voice came and he said
"My Lord, a shadow guard from Imperial Palace is here."
Xi Ying looked away from the door. His forehead still had a deep frown. Li Rui's lips were pressed in a thin line when she saw him like this.
She put her hand on his chest and stood up from his lap.
After that, she walked closer to the door and said calmly
"Let him enter."
It took An Si a moment to answer Li Rui but he did answer.
"As you say, My Lady."
After that, Li Rui walked and sat beside Xi Ying on the chair that had been placed for her for a long time.
Xi Ying looked at her silently and never said anything about what she was trying to do.
The shadow guard entered the study room soon.
His face was covered with a black cloth. Only his eyes could be seen.
It was only when Xi Ying felt his aura, that he turned his head to look at him. When his eyes fell on the hem of his black robe, they flickered.
Even before the shadow guard's next words, Xi Yiing already knew what he said.
"This one had been sent by Her Majesty, the Empress Dowager."