Don’t Pick Up Boyfriends From the Trash Bin Chapter 155 - System vs. System (5): Chance meeting, seven inches, the value is abnormal

Chapter 155 - System vs. System (5): Chance meeting, seven inches, the value is abnormal

Translator: kiribold
editors: yoantlers, sarah
Back to reality.
Chi Xiaochi integrated the known information and easily made a general summary.
Duan Shujue didn’t direct the resurrection. After all, he was a gentleman. Chi Xiaochi believed that Duan Shujue probably never imagined such extensive biodiversity in this world. Even before his death, his confusion and disbelief exceeded his hatred, so he failed to meet the lower limit of entropy set by the system.
Five years after his death, Ye Jiming took revenge for him and perished on that cliff. His hatred was so strong that his soul was captured by another Lord God who belonged to the same main system as theirs. However, Ye Jiming was unwilling to be resurrected alone, using the remnant soul from the fish scale bracelet in his hand to bring Duan Shujue back to life.
According to Ye Jiming’s request, the other Lord God drew up a report and submitted it to the supervisory agency.
This order was passed around several times before it finally fell into the hands of their more specialized counterpart, the Scum Gong Reconditioning System.
The rebirth of two people was a unique situation, after all. The Lord God negotiated with the supervisory system for a long time and finally decided that the memories of Ye Jiming and Duan Shujue could be preserved while rewinding the world’s timeline. But the threshold of the mission had to be increased. The host had to obtain 200 regret points from Yan Jinhua to leave the world.
This double-expanded, glorious-yet-fucked-up task fell on Chi Xiaochi’s shoulders without any accident.
If you said it wasn’t an inside job, Chi Xiaochi wouldn’t believe it.
After watching Duan Shujue’s entire memory, Chi Xiaochi considered it over and over. He felt it was difficult to describe the actions of this mission’s target with words, so he could only give Yan Jinhua five consecutive “You are so sassy.gifs”in the chat to pay respects.
Chi Xiaochi cut to the chase. “Is Yan Jinhua’s book-transmigration system your colleague?”
061 replied, “Our entire system is responsible for about seventy major programs, and the Scum Gong Reconditioning System is only one of them. There’s a book transmigration operation, but the main business of the system is to avenge people’s grievances, not to rewrite the ending, nor to gain people’s luck.”
Chi Xiaochi asked, “Is it the ‘revenge system’ that received Ye Jiming?”
061 replied, “Yes, it’s specifically for the domain of book transmigration.”
“Is there something wrong with Yan Jinhua’s transmigration system?”
“I tested it just now. But…” 061 shook his head helplessly, “I can’t detect its existence.”
Chi Xiaochi raised his eyebrows slightly.
“It should be like me with a strict defense mechanism. I probably need to send a prompting signal, then be at a relatively close distance to catch and monitor it,” 061 said. “The disadvantage is that if it’s the same as me, I’m afraid it’ll be difficult to eliminate at the source, but the advantage is that if I conceal myself well, it can’t detect me either.”
Chi Xiaochi nodded. He picked up the pebble at the bottom of the spring in his hand, tapped it, and quietly assessed the chips he and Yan Jinhua currently each had.
Obviously, Yan Jinhua was a big pig’s hoof as his name suggested with 0 shame and 1000 skin thickness. You probably needed to use a piling machine if you wanted to breakthrough. It was better to study and learn which pile driver was stronger than to hold onto hope that he would regret his actions.
To make him regret, taking a conventional path would be unlikely.
While fiddling with the pebbles, Chi Xiaochi obediently did Duan Shujue’s daily waterfall cultivation practice.
At the moment, there was another problem for them.
After all, rebirth and revenge weren’t Duan Shujue’s ideas, and Chi Xiaochi didn’t know what Duan Shujue was thinking.
There really were buns in this world who were willing to be eaten and spat out by dogs.
Chi Xiaochi put down a pebble and asked, “What’s in your heart?”
“You are a good person of ten lifetimes, but faced eighty-one trials. He murdered and set fire to become a Buddha. Can there be such a cheap business in the world?”
“It doesn’t matter if you die again; you can consider it as doing a good deed. If you can’t save yourself, you can still save Yan Jinhua and let him have fun again. But what about ‘him’? You’ve seen ‘his’ story, and you know what ‘he’ will become without restraint. ‘He’ was acting against the heavens this time. If ‘he’ fails, have you thought about what ‘he’ will look like at that time?”
“At that time, it won’t be Yan Jinhua who stops ‘him’; I’m afraid it’d be the heavens wanting to stop ‘him’.”
Chi Xiaochi said everything that should be said and gave Duan Shujue choices.
Now, it would be up to what Duan Shujue chose.
And soon, Duan Shujue gave his answer.
He lowered his head, and snow-white pebbles spelled a line of words on top of the various colored stones under the water.
Just now, Chi Xiaochi deliberately didn’t control his hands, returning dominance over the body to Duan Shujue instead.
Duan Shujue had extraordinary spiritual energy. Before being used by Yan Jinhua as a battery for the sword in the stone, he was a well-deserved and world-shattering talent. Although he couldn’t compare with Ji Zuoshan’s superior psychic energy and Chi Xiaochi couldn’t talk to him, the freedom to control his body was enough.
“Even if the heavens want him to die…” Duan Shujue, in his body, used the pebbles to show his thoughts. “I want him to live.”
Chi Xiaochi smiled slightly. “Understood.”
Duan Shujue fiddled with the pebbles again, gently acknowledging, “Sorry for the bother.”
His broken, remnant soul still remembered the five years he spent with Ye Jiming.
As expected of a self-proclaimed gentleman, even his pledges were particularly tactful.
After calculating the time, he had almost finished Duan Shujue’s morning cultivation homework. Chi Xiaochi stood up and wrung out his wet black hair.
The ice water had soaked all of his clothes; the thin white clothes stuck to his skin, and water flowed along the hem of his clothes into the spring drop by drop. Fortunately, mermaids had special physiques. They grew up in the deep sea for many years and weren’t afraid of the cold. After bathing in ice water, there was a current of heat surging between the meridians in his body.
He touched a position on his lower abdomen.
When the dantian flowed together, there was a clear sense of warmth. The experience of suddenly upgrading to an immortal was novel.
Chi Xiaochi chatted up 061 in his body. “Liu-laoshi, Liu-laoshi.”
At this time, 061’s mind was full of what Chi Xiaochi had said when persuading Duan Shujue.
“You know what Ye Jiming will become without restraint.”
…Chi Xiaochi wasn’t like that.
He was unwilling to accept it, more or less in fear that the Lou Ying from back then couldn’t take his change.
If he ignored Chi Xiaochi, wouldn’t he push him away again?
His heart softened a bit thinking of this. “Mn?”
Chi Xiaochi asked, “Guess what I’m thinking now?”
061 wanted to pat his head. “What?”
Chi Xiaochi said unperturbed, “To practice this skill, you must first go to the palace.”
Duan Shujue: “…”
061: “…” The little ancestor was trying to scare people again.
While he was chatting with 061, Chi Xiaochi’s mind moved.
Before he realized what was happening, his body reacted first.
He stepped sideways, paddling water single-footed, and embraced the boy in black who fell from the sky.
The youth’s body was cold and soft. Holding him in his arms was like holding snow.
He had a black snake scale pattern under his left eye. In the sparkling water and sunlight, it had a strange holographic texture, and the gradient stream of light was lovely.
The young man was also covered in water, staring at Chi Xiaochi with a smile.
According to the timeline, Ye Jiming had just left the mountain not long ago in this life. He hadn’t decided on a foothold, so he first wandered around Jingxu Peak, thinking about where to go in the future.
He got drunk and fell asleep in a small bamboo forest. When he suddenly woke up, he was covered in a cold sweat, as if he had a long nightmare.
Ye Jiming was stunned for a long time before he slowly reacted. He touched his throat and was overjoyed. He stood up and went straight back to the mountain, even forgetting his shoes in the bamboo forest.
Currently, he was just a tiny snake. Spiritual energy had nourished him for a long time, and the energy on his body was pure, so the defense formation of Jingxu Peak couldn’t hinder him.
He swam all the way here in the water, fell from the top of the waterfall, and was caught in someone’s full embrace. He didn’t feel ashamed, stretching his arms around the neck of the person in front of him, and laughed loudly.
But after the original wild laughter was weakened into a juvenile voice, the domineering spirit was gone. Instead, he looked childish and cute. “Surname Duan! You made this lord wait for so long!”
Chi Xiaochi politely introduced himself, “Hello, my surname is Chi. You can call me Surname Chi.”
Ye Jiming: “…”
When he heard that this person wasn’t Duan Shujue, Ye Jiming was startled and angry. He jumped out of the embrace and stepped into the water with bare feet. “Who are you?! Why haven’t you been contained by Duan Shujue?”
Even though he had been informed about the contents of the “contract” before, Ye Jiming always assumed that with Duan Shujue’s cultivation, how could he be easily held back by a mere “body snatcher”?
…reality proved that he was utterly wrong.
Ye Jiming’s face alternated between bursts of black and red. He wasn’t only embarrassed that he had thrown his arms around a stranger in vain, but was also angry that this person had taken over Duan Shujue’s body. In an instant, evil energy roared, and he couldn’t wait to kill this person with one strike. However, he failed to learn the essence of fighting cattle across the mountain and was reluctant to break Duan Shujue’s body, so he could only grit his teeth and sulk.
Chi Xiaochi was relatively at ease. After drying his hair, he waded to the edge of the cold spring, dried his wet clothes with spiritual power, and put his clothes back on.
As he tied the white hair ribbon around the high ponytail, Ye Jiming finally wrung up his strength and quickly stepped forward. He grabbed Chi Xiaochi’s sleeve and roared, “Go!”
Chi Xiaochi looked at him. “Go where?”
Ye Jiming shouted, “Shut up! I’m here to take him away, it has nothing to do with you.”
Chi Xiaochi smoothed his hair ribbon with one hand. “I’m not leaving.”
“Do you think his body is yours?” Ye Jiming was already very impatient. He couldn’t even maintain the disguise of his black eyes, and a pair of golden snake pupils suddenly emerged in a stern look. “It’s this lord’s!”
It was already a three-point loss if ordinary people faced this person’s harsh tone and severe expression, even if they weren’t afraid.
However, a 17- or 18-year-old boy puffing up to proclaim himself “this lord” was more like a small toothy beast with claws. Not to mention, when Chi Xiaochi was a child, there were people in the tube building who made medicinal wine all year round to nourish their bodies. They often brought back some snakes and reptile-like crawlers.
As soon as Chi Xiaochi saw the snake’s eyes, he thought of the dead snake used as medicine soaking in a glass jar, and his mood really couldn’t be serious or tense.
Chi Xiaochi said calmly, “Yours, yours, all yours. But how are you going to let me complete the mission?”
“Isn’t it just to make that Yan Jinhua regret?” Ye Jiming snorted coldly. “This lord will tie him up day after day to bleed him dry, pry his fingernails, peel his skin, and break his bones! I won’t believe you if you say this isn’t enough to get what you want!”
Chi Xiaochi admitted that this plan was quite constructive, and he also liked this kind of direct, no-nonsense punk style.
But he said slowly and deliberately, “Are you sure this is the path Duan Shujue wants to take?”
As soon as Duan Shujue was mentioned, Ye Jiming was much calmer.
Although he was impulsive, he wasn’t a reckless man. He always thought a few more steps ahead, especially for things that would benefit Duan Shujue.
During his brief time with the revenge system, he discovered that he was a character in a book.
To be honest, when Ye Jiming learned about this, his first reaction was to kill the author, who deserved a thousand knives.
How did the little fish wrong the author to be played like this?
However, after learning what the real little fish in the book was like, Ye Jiming dispelled this idea.
Regardless of whether or not this book was abandoned, it was up to each person to live their life according to their ability.
From the very beginning, Yan Jinhua was after Duan Shujue. He wanted to win the luck of the little fish he raised and use Duan Shujue to refine the mermaid pill that could protect him, exorcise evil spirits, cultivate swords, and prolong his life.
Once the little fish escaped, all of Yan Jinhua’s subsequent plans would be ruined, and he could only stay here. He would be an incompetent second senior disciple all his life, and everyone would mock him as a waste.
How could the Surname Yan be willing to give up?
As soon as Ye Jiming took the little fish away, Yan Jinhua only needed to use his so-called “system” to steal the treasure of Jingxu Peak and then push the blame on the little fish and Ye Jiming’s head. He would be okay as someone who didn’t mind a false reputation, but the little fish’s reputation in this life, wouldn’t it be ruined?
What’s more, the current Ye Jiming wasn’t the black jiao demon lord who deliberately showed weakness to gain a chance to breathe and cultivate against the heavens. He spent his days messing around, wandering the landscape, and his greatest pleasure was to bring spiritual fruit to feed the little fish. In terms of spiritual power, he wasn’t even as good as the little fish now.
How could he let the little fish protect him?
Ye Jiming became angrier the more he thought about it. He didn’t want the little fish to stay with the old bastard surnamed Yan. He hated himself for being incompetent, and his pale face turned pink with anger. He hated that he couldn’t bite Yan Jinhua to death once and for all.
At this moment, familiar footsteps came from outside the forest.
Ye Jiming’s rage just found an outlet. He wanted to go up and directly bite this person to death. Chi Xiaochi saw his intention and simply pointed at the right part of his abdomen.
Ye Jiming’s eyes widened suddenly, and before he could say a dirty word, he covered his lower abdomen and softened.
…How dare this bastard touch him seven inches!!
Ye Jiming’s seven inches suffered, and his body was soft like mud. Under the instruction of Chi Xiaochi’s gaze, he reluctantly turned into a little black snake and burrowed in along the cuff of his sleeve.
Ye Jiming suffered a great grievance this time, and he was so angry that he gnashed his teeth on Duan Shujue’s cuff. The cuff immediately made a ripping sound when he tore it with force and created a big hole.
Looking with satisfaction at the destruction he made, Ye Jiming’s temper cooled. He waved his tail to travel deeper into the cuff, wrapped around Duan Shujue’s waist through his inner robes, and coiled in circles around him.
His seven-inch position was still faintly numb. Ye Jiming was so furious that he had no choice but to spin around and curse.
Meanwhile, 061 secretly whispered to Chi Xiaochi, “Just now…you didn’t move?”
Chi Xiaochi took a wooden comb and brushed Duan Shujue’s long hair. “It wasn’t me just now.”
After that, he tilted his head slightly, facing the water with a smile. It completely overlapped with the image of the cold and beautiful Duan Shujue in everyone’s mind once more.
Yan Jinhua came back and found the young merman he had raised sitting on the bank with his back to him, combing his hair. Yan Jinhua felt quite smug.
He felt good as soon as he thought of how this used to be an all-powerful protagonist, who now waited for him to come home like a pet dog he kept.
In a great mood, Yan Jinhua went to look for the little dragon, but he was nowhere to be seen.
He just thought it was the little black snake being naughty, so he didn’t look closely. He washed his hands before returning to Yuguang Pool.
When Duan Shujue saw him, he gently and humbly nodded to him. “Yan-da ge.”
Yan Jinhua flung his hands, deliberately sprinkling water droplets on Duan Shujue’s face. “Where’s the little black snake?”
Ye Jiming was circled around Duan Shujue’s waist. He stuck his tongue out in anger: Your uncle is here.
Chi Xiaochi lightly wiped his face, and said to 061 in his heart, “It’s a pity I can’t curse.”
061, who has always been a gentleman, began to sincerely panic for the bottled-up Chi Xiaochi.
Fortunately, the etiquette on his face was well-maintained. His answer also had Duan Shu’s unparalleled courtesy. “He probably left.”
“…He left?!”
Even the gentle words couldn’t erase Yan Jinhua’s shock when he heard the news. He jumped up from the side of the spring. “What? When did he leave? Why did he leave?”
“He’s always had a wild nature.” Chi Xiaochi regarded him gently. “Yan-da ge, everyone has their own will; don’t force it.”
Yan Jinhua was dumbfounded.
After he rescued and brought the little black snake back to the mountain, he didn’t dare be negligent about knowing that he would become a dragon in the future. He sacrificed his hard-earned money and deliberately gave the fruit in his storage space brought forth by the spiritual spring to the little black snake to eat. Nobody could’ve expected that either the little black snake didn’t know what the goods were or knew too well. He would eat three or four pieces in a breath. He even ate and took at the same time, taking as many as seven at once to share with the little fish.
Even if it was watered by the spiritual spring, this precious tree could only produce seven or eight fruits in half a year. Yan Jinhua couldn’t bear the pain of cultivating, so he took advantage of this fruit to nourish his spiritual marrow. Who would have thought that the little black snake would always wantonly carry his fruits away without any courtesy?
To cope with the heartache, Yan Jinhua could only comfort himself:
One of them was for an elixir pill to be refined in the future, and the other was to become his future xiao-di. The stronger they were, the more benefits Yan Jinhua would get. This could be considered a long-term investment, like releasing a long line to catch a big fish.
Who would have thought that this little black snake would dust off his bum and head off without even saying a word of thanks?
Yan Jinhua truly felt distressed for those wasted fruits. He didn’t dare collapse his persona in front of Duan Shujue at this time, so he could only mumble, “This is too heartless.”
061’s ears twitched at these words.
At close range, he could faintly hear a strange mechanical sound.
“Beep! Host, please pay attention! Host, please pay attention! The original protagonist Duan Shujue’s favorability value towards you is abnormal! The value has returned to zero, currently applying for a re-inspection, please don’t panic–”