Chapter 386: This Is Also A Love
Translator: Henyee Translations Editor: Henyee Translations
Chen Silong crumpled the letter he had initially penned and decided to rewrite it.
His intention was to confide in his fifth sister about his genuine feelings and concerns, seeking her guidance.
In his current situation, if he were to marry Chen Shanshan but couldn’t reciprocate her affection to the same extent, would it be unjust to her?
He wanted his fifth sister to relay this situation to Chen Shanshan. If Chen Shanshan didn’t mind, he wouldn’t carry a heavy emotional burden.
Yet, as he rephrased the letter, he couldn’t shake the feeling that it wasn’t the right approach.
Truthfully informing Chen Shanshan through his fifth sister that he didn’t harbor strong romantic feelings for her, but was willing to marry her, might cause her considerable pain. It could even be seen as an insult.
Qin Silong discarded the letter he had just rewritten, feeling that it might be better to decline Chen Shanshan’s proposal.
Reflecting on his previous life, he had spent three years in a military camp, with only a single opportunity to return home during that time.
Currently, not even a year had passed since he returned home, and based on prior circumstances, it would be more than two years before he could visit again.
In two years, Chen Shanshan would be nineteen. Even if he were to marry her upon his next visit home, he would soon depart for the military camp, leaving her alone.
Furthermore, he couldn’t foresee what might transpire when he returned to the military camp. His previous life’s experiences concluded two years after his visit home, so he couldn’t predict what would happen next. If he were to return to the military camp and meet an unfortunate fate on the battlefield, wouldn’t that leave Chen Shanshan as a young widow?
Chen Shanshan was a genuinely kind-hearted girl, and Qin Silong felt a deep responsibility not to harm her.
So, Qin Silong composed a third letter, expressing his thoughts to Qin Zhenzhen with tact and care.
Unbeknownst to him, this letter actually placed a great deal of importance on Chen Shanshan. He was refusing her because he didn’t want to inflict pain on her, which, in reality, was a sign of his affection. It’s just that he hadn’t recognized it as a form of love.
As Qin Silong sealed the letter, he was on the verge of sending it when a pang of disappointment suddenly swept over him. Once this letter was dispatched, there would be no turning back.
Thoughts of Chen Shanshan resurfaced in his mind. He anticipated her sadness resulting from his rejection and the potential awkwardness they might face in future encounters. There was a possibility that they would cease all interactions, even if they met face to face, possibly turning away from each other.
He didn’t want his relationship with Chen Shanshan to deteriorate in this way.
Moreover, he contemplated the image of Chen Shanshan marrying someone else and realized he felt a hint of bitterness.
Qin Silong hesitated, tightly gripping the sealed letter. He questioned himself once more.
Did he genuinely lack feelings for Chen Shanshan?
If he truly felt nothing, why was he preoccupied with her?
Why did he experience disappointment after writing the rejection letter?
Why did the thought of her marrying another man evoke a sense of bitterness within him?
Finally, Qin Silong slapped the back of his head in realization.
He had been a complete fool!
He had erroneously assumed that he wasn’t drawn to Chen Shanshan, but that was far from the truth.
It wasn’t that he lacked feelings; rather, he had been entirely oblivious to the notion of love. His focus had solely revolved around honing his martial arts skills and establishing himself in the military camp. Love hadn’t factored into his mindset.
Even if a peerless beauty was in front of him, he might ignore her.
It was really strange. When he suspected that he might like Chen Shanshan, some details of his interaction with Chen Shanshan played in his mind.
Every scene was worth reminiscing about..