Chapter 209 - The Return of a Legend II (8)
Yuren looked sick.
“…he’s lost his mind. I guess it is to be expected. Every being sealed within was like that.”
“That is why I sealed him. Of course, there was a part of me that sympathized with his feelings, and I agreed with his plan to a certain extent….. However, I came to the conclusion that a world where no new possibility could be born couldn’t last forever. The mind world and the material world are two sides of the same coin. If new possibility cannot be provided on one side, I worried the other side would become starved.”
Yuren’s expression turned peculiar. Atein’s reason drastically differed from what he would have come up with.
“Does that mean you wouldn’t have gotten in the way of Reginor if a true eternal paradise could have been created?”
“I think so. His method had the possibility of transcending the many problems of this world. He might have created a utopia.”
“…….”
“Amongst the 12 transcendent beings I sealed, Reginor’s goal was the most realistic and idealistic amongst them. The others were like the beings you guys put down. They were trying to fulfill inadmissible ideas.”
“You call that idea realistic? You are crazy too.”
“If seen from the perspective of a human, I won’t deny that it looks that way. However...”
Atein continued to speak in a calm manner.
“Every one of them had come to the same conclusion as me.”
“They wanted to create a paradise? I guess you started the Dragon Demon war to create your ideal nation.”
“No. I’m talking about something that is much more fundamental. Each and every one of them thought they would someday be alone.”
Humans died.
Nations made by humans perished at some point in time.
Then…….
“I believe humanity will become extinct some day.”
If a person he loved died, it was sad. However, he could accept it with humility. However, what happens if there weren’t anyone that he could sympathize and communicate with? What happens if no one was left? He couldn’t accept the fear caused by this idea.
It wasn’t just Atein. Every single being that was sealed possessed the same fear.
They all knew that humanity would become extinct some day. If left alone, the unending malice of humans would cause them to kill each other. They all wanted to stop that. They all thought their own method could ensure that the future would be perpetuated through eternity. They were all sure that their own method was the only method that could guarantee success.
“I like the fact that the things I made was passed down and improved on. I like that my story was told. I’m fine even if I become a distorted version myself. I don’t mind if humans repeat their foolish mistakes. I’ll tolerate anything if I’m not the only one left in this world….”
Atein lived for a very long time, and he remained a stranger to everyone. No one could exist in the same time frame as him. The Dragon Demon generals were like children to him.
Countless meetings and partings repeated itself. His interests and attachments dimmed towards individuals. He now saw everything as a whole, and he watched everything at a distance. His goal for humans…. His goal for all intelligent beings was survival and happiness.
Yuren spoke.
“You are…. You are egotistical at a really grand scale.”
“I won’t deny that fact. I changed the world for myself, and I’m trying to change it again.”
“However, I think I can understand how you feel by a very minute amount.”
“You are human, yet you are saying that?”
Atein tilted his head. From his perspective, the human youth was like a mayfly, yet Atein didn’t express anger or ridicule. He just looked puzzled.
Yuren spoke.
“It happened because of you. You probably already know this, but I grew up under the care of the fanatics that worship you as a god.”
“I know that.”
“That place was a factory that created more fanatics.”
The Dragon Demon King worshipper fostered numerous children, and they were crammed with madness. They were created to be fanatics in this factory. Each children’s thought process was separated from the common sense of the world.
Anyone that wasn’t a Dragon Demon King worshippers were great sinners. They could be killed with impunity. No, it was righteous to kill the non-believers, and one shouldn’t feel afraid of sacrificing one’s life to kill them.
Everyone was made to think the same, and Yuren had awakened to his own sanity thanks to the Guide. He became a loner from that point on.
Everyone that breathed and occupied the same space as him spoke the same language, yet he couldn’t empathize with them at all. From Yuren’s perspective, they were all monsters in the visage of humans.
“I couldn’t share joy or sadness with them. It wouldn’t have mattered if it was something inconsequential. It would have been great if I could laugh with them, but there was no way I could do that.”
He could pretend to be like them on the outside. However, that was just a necessary attempt at survival. He had to act. Fear and loneliness was the two emotions that had ruled over Yuren for a very long time.
“That is why I can understand your feelings a little bit, Atein.”
“I see…….”
Atein let out a bitter laugh. Atein didn’t deny Yuren’s claim that he understood how Atein felt. For a moment, the two of them shared a small portion of each other’s loneliness.
Yuren spoke.
“Shall we go back to the beginning? That is why I’m scared.”
“I still don’t understand what that has to do with your identity.”
“I don’t know who I am. I am Carlos Rizester’s descendant, and I was grown to be a human weapon by the hands of the Dragon Demon king worshippers. It still leaves many unanswered questions. Didn’t I tell you earlier? I was awakened by an unknown being called the Guide.”
“You did. I really am curious to know his identity.”
“You might be able to find out soon. Anyways, someone planned out my destiny. Still, I am thankful for being allowed to understand freedom. I’m thankful for being able to choose my own fate.”
“Then why are you afraid?”
“I’ve been lonely for a very long time. However, I’m no longer lonely.”
Yuren turned to look at his comrades. He did not elaborate any further. The words he had spoken right now was so embarrassing that it was hard to bear,
“I no longer feel lonely thanks to them, and I’m afraid of hurting them.”
Yuren spoke those words as he took out something from his pocket. It was nondescript. It was a fist sized steel box.
Carlos had given it to him. It was called the Box of Hope. Yuren had been warned that he would face irreversible destruction when he opened it.
“Azell.”
Yuren’s gaze remained on Atein as he spoke.
“I know you are awake. So do you mind answering me?”
“Yuren, you…..”
Azell answered him.
It was clear that Azell was flustered. He didn’t care that Yuren realized that he was awake. However, he cared about the fact that Yuren had went out of his way to reveal his consciousness to his enemies.
Azell had received help from Arrieta. She had given him emergency treatment to his wounds, and he was waiting for an opportunity to go on the counteroffensive. He was severely injured, but he was able to use Incarnation. He would time the move with an all out assault by the Guardian Shadows. He judged that it would allow them the opportunity to escape from this place.
From just that single phrase from Yuren, his plan became useless. Yuren knew this, yet he continued to speak calmly.
“You spoke about me with Carlos-nim, right?”
“…….”
“I know that you know a secret, and it is something that you are having a difficult time telling me. I picked up on it. In truth, it was quite apparent from Carlos-nim’s attitude when he gave me this item.”
Unlike the other party members, Yuren couldn’t be trusted. Carlos had made this judgement, and this was why Yuren wasn’t given any items that increased his overall capabilities. Moreover, Carlos had made sure that Laura was the only one that could look into the magic tome left behind by Carlos.
Yuren wasn’t an idiot, so he easily realized what was going on. It would be a lie to say he wasn’t hurt by their actions, but he also understood why they had decided that course of action.
“I’m afraid, because I cannot trust myself. Therefore, how can I ask others to believe in me?”
Azell let out a bitter laughter as he looked at Yuren. Azell’s gaze rose to meet Yuren’s eyes.
“I am thankful.”
Yuren’s gaze was directed towards his comrades.
Azell, Laura, Kairen, Leticia and Arrieta…..
“By meeting you all, I was able to like myself just a little bit..”
“Yuren…….”
“Please tell me about Carlos-nim’s conjecture as to what my identity is. I want to hear it from you.”
For a moment, Azell read a familiar emotion in Yuren’s eyes. He had seen it so much that he was sick of it. These emotions were something Azell no longer wanted to see in the eyes of others.
Yuren was ready to die here.
When Yuren realized Azell’s plan, he messed it up, because he had made up his mind. His sacrifice would bring about a better result than Azell’s plan. That was what he determined.
“…Carlos surmised that you might be the reincarnation of Kayalia.”
“Kayalia? Isn’t she Atein’s third wife? How?”
Yuren couldn’t understand how this could be possible. In truth, Yuren had expected Azell to name Aunsaurus or Baldazark. Carlos had fought in the Great Darkness to stop the revival of those two, so Yuren believed that one of those two had been reincarnated as himself.
Azell spoke.
“It isn’t well-known, but Kaylia is an existence that knows the technique of reincarnation. Before she became Atein’s wife, she had her own kingdom, and she was continuously born again through her descendants. She had lived for a very long time, and she was very powerful.”
“Ah. That’s why.”
He accepted the explanation. It lined up too well with the theory he had about his own identity.
At the same time, he was sure that they were wrong.
‘I’m not Kayalia.’
If Reygus possessed a living body at that moment, Yuren might have felt something was off when he saw Reygus’ expression. For a brief moment, Almarick had flinched, but he had schooled his expression. Unlike Almarick, Reygus would have had an odd expression on his face.
However, Reygus was an Undead now. He was also in his transformed state, so his expression couldn’t be viewed by anyone. That is why Yuren could only trust in what he felt in his guts.
Azell spoke.
“According to the information gathered by Carlos, Kayalia lived as a completely different person until she is awakened. At some moment, she awakens to become Kayalia once again… Carlos worried that we would face an archmage that rivalled the Dragon Demon generals when you awakened. He was afraid you would become our enemy.”
Azell had spoken to Laura about this. He believed there was no way Yuren would become their enemy.
It wasn’t a lie. If Yuren became conscious of his identity as Kayalia, his sense of self as Yuren would die. Kayalia would take its place.
“Thank you.”
When he heard Azell’s answer, Yuren let out a bright smile.
“The regrets…. If I'm to be truthful, I still have many left. However, I think I can leave them behind.”
He still didn’t know what his identity was. If he continued on this path, his fear might be realized. He might awaken to become the enemy of his party.
That was why this was the right time for him.
He believed in his ancestor Carlos. Carlos had been suspicious of Yuren’s identity, so Carlos had given him this item. There was no way this item would cause harm to Azell.
‘I don’t care what my identity is.’
The only important thing right now was the fact that he would never turn against his comrades. The truth might destroy his soul, but if it was the cost to saving his comrades, he would gladly accept it.
“Thank you for waiting, Atein.”
“You still have something you can do?”
“I’m happy to say that I do have something.”
Yuren grabbed the Box of Hope.
“Azell, Laura and Arrieta.”
He laughed as he turned to those that were still conscious.
“Please give my thanks to Leticia and the duke.”
He opened the box, and black darkness started pouring out.