Chapter 59: 59
I didn't know when a gasp escaped my lips because it felt like I could barely breathe, let alone make a sound. Lucian turned his head and when he saw me standing there his eyes widened. Unconsciously I took a few steps back then turned around and ran back to my room. My heart was beating wildly and I felt like throwing up.
A heart? I just saw a beating heart. My head began to spin and I sat slowly down on the bed so that I wouldn't fall. I realized I was shaking slightly. I had seen people die before but I had never seen anything like this.
My heart suddenly jumped at the sound of the door opening. Lucian closed the door behind him and just stood there watching me intently. I tried to avoid his gaze.
After a while I could hear his footsteps coming closer until he stood right in front of me. He grabbed my chin and lift my head up so I that I was looking at him.
"Are you afraid of me?" He asked with a soft voice.
I shook my head. "No." and I wasn't lying. I knew he would never hurt me but I just...I didn't know what it was but I was very disturbed.
He sat next to me on the bed and put his arm around my shoulder. "Hazel, you know and I told you, killing comes easily to me."
"I know."
"Then?"
"Then...I don't know Lucian. It was just a disturbing image. Did you have to kill him that way?"
"No, but right now I have to use fear to reach my goal."
I just nodded. I knew it wasn't the first time he had done that.
"Hazel" He grabbed my ching again to make me look at him. "I told you there is darkness inside of me. No matter how much I try to resist that part of me it's still there and it will always be."
Was it maybe because he was a demon? Should I tell him about it? I turned to him completely while thinking if how to tell him without sounding crazy.
"Lucian...I...I need to tell you something." Maybe he would feel relieved to know that he was a demon, because maybe he would understand himself better then. It made me at least understand him better.
I looked at his face. Gazed into his golden eyes, or to be correct his flaming eyes. Flames of hellfire, I thought. I had grown up to fear hell and demons. I had learned that they were Evil, to protect myself from them but guess what? I fell in love with one.
"You wanted to say something?" He said breaking my train of thoughts.
I shook my head. "Yes...I...I." But the words just refused to come out.
"You what Hazel?"
No I needed some more time to think of how to tell him.
"I...your...your mistresses. I want to see your mistresses?" I said. I wanted to see his reaction and if what Ylva told me was true.
He raised one brow. "My mistresses? Hmm...why do you suddenly want to see them?"
"I just want to." I shrugged.
He grabbed my chin and made me look at him. "Want to see if anyone is prettier than you?" He had that look when he enjoyed the conversation.
"Will you let me see them?" I asked ignoring his question.
"Alright then." He said standing up. My heart dropped inside my chest. I had really believed Ylvas words but of course, he still had mistresses. Jealousy hit me like a knife. Why was I suddenly jealous when I had known all this time?
"Follow me." He said grabbing my arm and leading me toward the door to his personal room.
Wait! Was she inside his room. No!
I panicked as he opened the door and pulled me inside. I didn't want to see any mistress anymore. I pulled my hand away from his grip but we were already inside.
His personal room was almost as big as our chamber, decorated beautifully with rich material. I looked around but the room was empty
"What are we doing here?" I asked.
"You wanted to see my mistress. I plan on showing you the most beautiful one of them." He grabbed my arm and pulled me further into the room.
"I don't want to anymore." I protested.
He stopped. "You don't want to?"
I shook my head.
"But I want to show you!" He said and kept dragging me until I was standing in front of a mirror with my back against him.
He put his hands on my shoulders. "Do you see her?" He asked nodding toward the mirror.
"I only see myself." I said confused.
He nodded.
"I thought you were going to show me your mistress."
"I am. There she is." He said pointing at my reflection.
"But...that's me. I am not your mistress."
"No. But you are my everything, and when I have everything in the world, why would I need something else?"
He really knew how to make my heart melt but then I realized he had been teasing me all those times.
I turned around to face him. "Where you mocking me all those times?"
He chuckled. "I thought you had already figured that out."
I crossed my arms over my chest and gave him a glare.
"Alright, alright. I am sorry." He smiled.
"But where did you go when you were hurt and said you would go to your mistress?"
His face turned serious. "When my wounds are deep the healing can be quite painful so I just wanted to be alone."
I remembered his voice in my head that night. It had been filled with pain and agony. Was the healing that painful.
"You should have let me stay with you."
"Remember you were angry with me?" He reminded.
"Yes, because you kept teasing me with your mistresses." I reminded him in return.
He sighed with a smile as if accepting defeat. I felt relieved that we addressed this issue even though I shouldn't. Even if he didn't have any mistresses now it would be impossible to stay without mistresses or worse several wives if he becomes a king. The thought of him spending the whole night with his other wives or mistresses made my stomach hurt.
"What is it?" He asked lifting my chin.
"Nothing." I shook my head.
"Hazel, I know something is disturbing you. Is it...the woman in Gatrish?"
Oh...I had almost forgotten the blonde seductive dancer in Gatrish, but it didn't matter anymore. As a woman, a princess and maybe a queen this was my fate, to share my husband with other women.
"I was desperate and..."
"You don't have to explain. I know I will never have you entirely for myself but at least your heart, I wish to be the only person in your heart."
He took my face in his hands. "And I will grant every wish of yours."
Lucian and I walked hand in hand around our personal garden after eating lunch. We didnät say much, just enjoyed each other's company.
"It's safe for you to walk outside the room now. None of Pierres men are left and his staff are kept in his quarters."
"What do you plan to do with them?"
"Send them home eventually. There are young girls and old women, people with families, I can't just kill them." He explained.
I smiled at him. "You made a good decision."
We came to my favorite place. The beautiful white swing. Lucian and I sat down and he put his arm around my shoulders while I rested my head on his chest.
"Lucian?"
"Yes."
"You know I love you for who you are? No matter what you are, even if you are a vampire I will love you."
"I know." He said.
It was quiet for a moment and I thought of a way to tell him.
"Lucian..." I pulled away from his hold to look at him. "What if I told you that you are a...demon?"
He looked at me with a narrowed gaze. "Am I?" He asked.
I nodded slowly as my heart pounded inside my chest.
"How do you know?" He asked.
I straightened myself and decided it was time to tell him everything. I began to tell him how I met Irene, what she told me, about Lothaire, Roshan and Enoch. Lucian listened carefully and nodded sometimes.
"So Irene is a witch, Enoch and Roshan are demons and Lothaire is the devil?" He asked.
I nodded. "I know it sounds crazy, even I couldn't believe it at the beginning but I could just feel it. I felt strange when I met Lothaire, something about him...his aura, his eyes...I don't know exactly what...and he had silver hair."
Lucians eyes widened as if in shock. "Did you say silver hair?"
"Yes." I said confused. "What is it?"
"I have met him Hazel."
Lothaire and Lucian met?
"When?"
"When we were in Gatrish."
So it wasn't recently? If Lothaire went to meet Lucian then maybe he was Lucian's father but why wasn't he showing himself? Why wasn't he helping?
"Did he tell you something?" I asked.
"Nothing special. He just wanted me to win this war because he didn't like my brothers." Lucian said with a frown.
Lothaire the devil went to see Lucian who is rumored to be the devils son, it only made sense that Lothaire was Lucian's father even if it didn't make sense at the same time.
"Lucian I think..." I began, turning to him but stopped.
He was holding his heart and grimaced in pain. "Lucian what's happening?" The veins on his neck and forehead popped out and his face turned read. I panicked.
"Lucian? What's happening to you?" He fell from the swing, still squeezing his chest. It looked like he was in extreme pain. "Lucian?" I tried to run and bring some help but he grabbed my arm to stop me from going.
He shook his head violently. "Don't!" He said then took a deep breath. "I am fine now."
He took a few more deep breaths then the color on his face slowly returned to normal, just then Lincoln came rushing. I didn't hear him knock.
"Your Highness Pierre..." He began but when he noticed Lucian on his knees he hurried toward us and fell to his knees.
"Your Highness...What happened to you?"
"Nothing..."Lucian waved his hand. "What is it with Pierre?"
Lincoln frowned. "Pierre is here with his army, inside the castle." He spoke fast.
Lucian's eyes widened and he stood up quickly.
"Callum, take Hazel away from here safely. Lincoln you follow me." He said.
I didn't even realize that Callum was here. "But Lucian..."
"Just think about getting safely out of here. I will be right behind you so don't worry." He said then left quickly with Lincoln.
I stood there frozen for a while when Callum grabbed my arm and shook me slightly.
"My Lady we need to leave!" He said.
Leave Lucian? How could I?
"You can be used as a weapon against His Highness. You are helping him by escaping." He assured as if he read my mind.